


Paper Jam

by Iolaire



Category: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016), Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, F/M, Graduate School, I'm Bad At Tagging, Science
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-28
Updated: 2017-05-22
Packaged: 2018-09-20 10:05:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 22,743
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9486461
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Iolaire/pseuds/Iolaire
Summary: Modern-AU GradSchool!verse in which Cassian is a jaded PhD candidate in his sixth year and Jyn keeps breaking the printer. With a department under scrutiny, an advisor like Davits Draven, and a rival like Orson Krennic, will Cassian *ever* graduate?





	1. An Inauspicious Beginning

### Chapter 1: An Inauspicious Beginning

Cassian rubs at his eyes. He’s been staring at his laptop screen for what feels like the entire day, and even with it dimmed in power-saver mode it still seems glaringly bright to his strained eyes. He glances down to the bottom right-hand corner. 8:47 pm. That’s not nearly as late as he thought it was, he’s certainly stayed later before (spent the night, even), but he figures the solid twelve hours he’s just put in are probably enough for now. He’ll just print out one last article for some bedtime reading and then head out for the night. With a sigh of resignation he clicks the print button and listens for the printer to start before closing down his laptop.

Several seconds pass, and the printer still isn’t doing anything. Cassian sighs again, this time in annoyance, before pushing himself away from his desk to investigate. The little red light is flashing, and the printer is throwing one of its various “paper jam” errors. _Seriously?_ Cassian has been sitting alone in the graduate student office since 6:30 when Leia left, so someone made the conscious decision to leave the jam. This would be irksome under any circumstances, but in addition to Cassian having worked over twelve hours today, he had to deal with Dr. Draven’s whiny undergrads begging him to reconsider their latest test grades for approximately two of those twelve hours. He has had enough annoyances for one day.

Cassian opens the side door. There’s one sheet stuck in the fuser and another on the roller. After liberating the offending paper from the fuser he sees the problem: too much color ink. Their printer is finicky and tends to jam just about every time someone tries to print pages with large color images. Everyone in the office knows this, but every now and then some optimistic first-year attempts to print an article full of fluorescence imaging, and they all spend the rest of the day fighting the printer until it works the extra ink out of its system. One glance at the sheet of paper in his hand tells Cassian this is exactly what has happened, further confirmed when he sees the subject of the paper is _Bacillus anthracis_. Definitely Dr. Mothma’s new student, then. 

Fighting down his irritation, as it’s likely no one has yet explained the eccentricities of the shared office printer to the new girl, Cassian does a final check of all the less-obvious internal components to ensure no other papers are jammed before closing the door. The printer whirs backs to life, re-checks its calibration, and then dutifully begins spitting out the remaining pages of the anthrax article. Mercifully, it then dutifully spits out his paper without incident. Cassian gathers the loose sheets and heads back to his desk. He shoves his paper into his backpack along with his laptop and leaves the new girl’s article on his desk to give to her in the morning. He’ll deliver it along with the printer lecture, though that should really be Leia’s job (it’s her labmate, after all).

He passes the new girl’s cubicle on the way out. It’s still pretty barren—just a calendar pinned to the corkboard, some assorted writing implements, and an immunology textbook—so the single paper with the bright pink post-it note emblazoned with Leia’s handwriting easily catches his eye. **Jyn—what did I tell you about color printing? –L.** Cassian frowns. This is not the new girl’s— _Jyn’s_ —first offense, then.

Cassian hasn’t even met Jyn yet, but he already doesn’t like her. Sure, Dr. Mothma had assured the faculty (and then the faculty had assured their students) that Jyn’s presence would not jeopardize the Department’s reputation, but Cassian isn’t convinced. And this incident with the printer is certainly not helping his opinion of her. Perhaps it isn’t fair, but Cassian and Kay have had way too many private bitch-sessions about precisely how bad of an idea her presence is for Cassian to feel anything but disdain for her. Jyn’s transfer into their program has exposed the Department to scrutiny they simply don’t need. But Dr. Mon Mothma is a rock-star in her field, rolling in grant money, and Department Head to boot, so she only met minor resistance when voicing her intent to extend an offer to the disgraced Dr. Saw Gerrera’s former mentee. 

It had been a nasty business, that. Research involving biothreat agents is high stakes, with high potential to save lives but also high potential for abuse. There are therefore certain lines you just don’t cross. Gerrera had been a frequent collaborator of Mothma’s at a sister institution before his research started to stray a bit too close to that line. He had started arguing that if they could create a super-virulent strain of _Bacillus anthracis_ and study immune responses to it, they’d be able to develop better vaccines, better treatments. They’d be one step ahead of the terrorists! Funding sources hadn’t quite seen it that way, and neither had the government. It was obvious to everyone but Gerrera that the potential for dual-use was far too great to justify the potential benefits. But this had not stopped Saw Gerrera. 

Everything came out eventually, of course. Gain-of-function experiments had been involved, and from what was publically available, it appeared as though Gerrera had been at least partially successful. His university had immediately cut off all internal funding, placed him on administrative leave pending a full investigation by both the university and the Feds, and suspended all of his graduate students and other lab staff until it could be determined who was actually involved. That was where Jyn came in. She was eventually deemed to have not been even tangentially involved in any of the experiments—hadn’t even known about them. (Cassian had his doubts about how any grad student could be so oblivious to such clearly unethical, potentially illegal, activities occurring within their lab.) The investigation did not work out so favorably for Gerrera: he was barred from ever again working with select agents and only barely escaped legal prosecution. So while Jyn had been absolved of any wrong-doing herself, she had lost all ability to continue her research under Saw Gerrera’s direction. Years of work wasted, and good luck finding anyone willing to take a risk on you after being embroiled in that shitstorm.

Enter Mon Mothma and her damnable tendency to take in strays. She had met Jyn at a conference two years ago and had apparently been very impressed. So impressed that she was willing to invite the shitstorm here by offering Jyn a place in her lab. Cassian is confident all of the work within this department is 100% compliant with regulations, and he is equally confident that nothing even borderline unethical or questionable is happening. But no one likes being under a microscope, and he currently feels like the press is just _waiting_ for one of them to make a tiny slip-up so they can pounce. It is not the sort of stress he needs in his sixth year. He just wants to graduate.

Cassian heads for the rear entrance of the building and relishes the slam of the door behind him. He’s actually glad to be going home now. He’ll have a relaxing evening reading his paper. Maybe even watch some Breaking Bad on Netflix. And he will most certainly forget all about Jyn Erso.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I love Jyn, but we all know she’d be the type to jam the shared printer and leave it.
> 
> I do have an idea of how this story is going to go, but I’m not a very prolific writer, so please bear with me as I crawl along at a snail’s pace. Additionally, the science involved in this fic is basically a convenient backdrop and plot device, so while I will try to stay true to the science where possible, a certain suspension of disbelief will be required so I can better work in the Rogue One elements.
> 
> For those unfamiliar with the term, select agents are bacteria, viruses, and toxins that have been deemed by either the CDC or USDA (US government agencies) as being at high risk for potential use as a biological weapon. Some of the better-known select agents include _Bacillus anthracis_ (anthrax), _Yersinia pestis_ (plague/Black Death), and _variola major_ (smallpox). Work with these agents is closely regulated for obvious reasons. I wanted to give Jyn and Cassian some high-stakes pathogens because I figured it’d be harder to sell the excitement of working with fruit flies. (No disrespect to fruit flies, because we owe some awesome scientific breakthroughs to them, but they’re simply not as exotic as anthrax.)


	2. The First Encounter

### Chapter 2: The First Encounter

The following morning sees Cassian at his desk, laptop open in front of him and steaming mug of black coffee sitting at his right elbow. He is almost never the first one here in the morning (unless he just never left the night before), so most of the other students are already here, though most are either in their labs or scattered around campus at their various classes. He had already learned from Leia that Jyn had a class this morning starting at 8, so she wouldn’t be back until 11:15 at earliest. It is currently 9:30, so Cassian is in the middle of scanning his daily PubCrawler results and idly thinking about what he should say to Jyn.

“She jammed it again already?” Leia had asked, without any trace of actual curiosity or sympathy for Cassian when he had approached her. Leia may be feisty when it comes to her research, but much like her advisor she tries to be diplomatic when dealing with people. (With the notable exception of her brother.) However, Cassian is surprised she isn’t as upset about Jyn’s inconsideration as he is, given Leia’s penchant for running a tight ship. He had personally witnessed her lay in to Luke once for just such an offense. But then again, Luke and Leia are siblings, and he suspects their shared love language is Bickering.

“You want me to talk to her again?” she’d asked when he hadn’t said anything further.

“No. No, I’ll handle it myself.”

He’s just deciding that maybe he’ll try the “friendly” approach after all and refilling his coffee from the communal pot for the third time when Jyn arrives. She’s dressed for the summer weather—shorts, flip-flops, and a tank top—and that annoys Cassian all over again. She works in a _lab_. With _anthrax_. And she comes breezing in here like she’s ready for a stroll on the beach. He quickly retrieves her paper from his desk and rounds the corner to her cubicle. He’s ready to air his accusation before she’s even finished lifting the messenger bag from her shoulders. 

“This yours?” he asks, tossing the paper onto her desk to join the one Leia had retrieved.

It comes out a little more sharply than he’d intended, but he’s irritated and justified in being so. Jyn places her bag on the floor and reaches for the paper. She flips through it briefly before replying.

“Yeah, it is. Thanks.”

And then she sits down, unapologetic. Cassian stands there for a moment staring at her as she proceeds to unpack her laptop.

“You have something else to say?” she asks as she plugs in the charger without looking at him.

“We all use that printer.”

“And?”

“When you jam it, it’s your responsibility to unjam it.”

“Look, I was running late for a meeting with my advisor and I forgot I’d told the thing to print, ok?”

She’s looking at him now, and she’s defensive. Cassian wants to say that it is _not_ ok, because this isn’t so much about the printer as her lack of consideration for everyone else in the office. They are a hodgepodge group scattered across various disciplines, but they all have to share departmental resources. Someone sets a precedent for leaving their paper jams for others to deal with and next thing you know someone will make the last pot of coffee without buying a new bag. And if Jyn thinks Cassian is unreasonable now, just wait until she sees him without caffeine. That is a whole new level of crotchety. However, they are interrupted before Cassian can say any of this.

“Um…Mr. Andor?”

Cassian turns toward the voice. He vaguely registers the young man standing at the entrance to the office space as one of Dr. Draven’s students. He didn’t even realize he could get anymore aggravated than he currently is, but the undergrad’s interruption has proven him wrong. There is only one reason Draven’s students ever seek him out.

“I know yesterday was the last day for me to come if I wanted to talk about my grade, but I was pretty hung-over, and, well, I sort of forgot.”

Cassian is willing to bet good money that this kid is pre-med. (They’re always pre-med. One day he will walk into a doctor’s office, see this kid with a stethoscope, and walk right back out.) He is about to tell the student that he’ll have to go to Dr. Draven now, as Cassian had finalized the scores yesterday evening, when Jyn beats him to it.

“Then you can ‘forget’ about discussing your grade,” she deadpans, and the vocal airquotes are unmistakable. “Your classmates managed to be here yesterday. Why should you get special treatment?” 

The student looks at Jyn, clearly confused as to who she is and why she’s being _so mean_ when he’s never even seen her before. Cassian is surprised himself. Jyn had said exactly what he’d been thinking, though Cassian had been planning to take a page out of Leia’s book and try to be diplomatic in his rebuff of the student. 

“The grades have been finalized. Dr. Draven is the only one who can change yours now,” he says as though Jyn had never spoken.

“And maybe save the bingers for the weekend,” he swears he hears Jyn mutter as the student shuffles out of the office, crestfallen. Cassian wants to smile at that, but he doesn’t. He’s still mad at her. He does, however, notice the ghost of a smile tugging at the corner of Leia’s lips.

“Seriously though, Jyn, stop jamming the printer before you give poor Cassian an aneurism. He’s starting to write his dissertation and liable to murder repeat offenders,” Leia says.

Jyn snorts, “I make no promises.”

Cassian’s expression darkens. Orson Krennic may be his professional arch-nemesis, but this woman is on her way to becoming his close second.


	3. Sorry We Missed You...

### Chapter 3: Sorry We Missed You...

The next several weeks are a source of frustration to Cassian, courtesy of one Jyn Erso. It isn’t just the printer, which she continues to jam with an efficiency that is actually quite astounding, but a plethora of other little things. He needs to run off copies of a lab assignment for Dr. Draven, and she’s there ahead of him doing the same for Dr. Mothma. He goes to sign up for a block of time for the centrifuge, and Jyn’s taken the slot he was going to claim. He wants to go to lunch with Luke and Leia to discuss an interesting paper he’d come across, but they’ve already gone for an early meal with Jyn. He tries to set up the teaching lab for tomorrow’s class, and he finds it locked because one of Jyn’s undergrads forgot the key was in his pocket before leaving for the day. (This incident was actually much more frustrating for Jyn, as the undergrad had locked all of her media in the lab, but Cassian isn’t willing to cut her any slack.) Once she even buys the last Coke Zero from the vending machine; Cassian very rarely drinks soda, so naturally the one day he’s craving one it would be denied him because of Jyn Erso.

His one solace is that Kay comes back from his conference-turned-extended-vacation three weeks after Jyn’s arrival. If there is one thing Cassian can count on, it is that Kay dislikes Jyn even more than he does. And while Cassian may glower at Jyn every time he pulls a _Bacillus_ paper from the fuser and silently hands it to her, Kay is rather more vocal. Kay rarely uses the joint resources himself, seeing as how he’s a post-doc and has his own private mega-setup crowding his closet of an office. (That, and the fact that bioinformaticians are much pickier about their equipment in general.) However, Kay and Cassian are a team. And that means Kay turns the full power of his utter lack of a filter on the office nuisance that is currently making Cassian’s life hell.

“Would you like to know the odds of everyone in this department loathing you by the end of the semester if you continue in this manner, Jyn Erso?” Kay asks one day.

Kay is here to discuss some of his latest data analysis with Cassian but had gone to steep some tea for himself and refill Cassian’s coffee for him. He is now leaning against the precarious desk on which the coffee pot and kettle sit, which happens to be adjacent to the printer. The accusation is perhaps unfair, as for once Jyn is actively engaged in replacing a toner cartridge, and Cassian supposes that is why her normal impassivity has been replaced with a venomous glare. She doesn’t answer him, only slams the door shut with a little more force than is strictly necessary and gives the printer a solid thump with her fist to encourage it along, all while refusing to break eye contact with Kay. A lesser man may have felt a bit uncomfortable, but Kay is impervious to the negative emotions of others.

“They’re high,” Kay says and takes a sip of his tea before returning to Cassian’s desk. “Very high.”

Jyn continues to glare at Kay’s retreating back for a bit longer, then stalks back to her desk. He hears her gather her things, followed by her muffled footsteps heading toward the exit. Kay is pointing at various things on Cassian’s laptop screen, but suddenly the analysis doesn’t seem nearly as interesting as it had before Kay’s tea break. Cassian fleetingly wonders if Jyn is upset.

* * *

Cassian decides to eat his lunch outside. It’s oppressively hot in the sun, but bearable so long as he stays in the shade. He walks to the little koi pond across the quad from the Department, sits, and watches the turtles as he eats. He’s always found it relaxing here. The pond is artificial, and he supposes it was constructed as a sort of accent to the Ecology Department it’s situated beside. It’s perfectly square, surrounded by natural slab paving stones, and bordered on two sides by a low stone wall. For this reason, the pond itself is not immediately obvious from the pathway that winds between the buildings, and there are a significant number of birch trees and native grasses that further obscure it from view. Cassian had only found it because he got curious about why the people who occasionally sat on the wall tended to stare at the ground on the opposite side. Today he has the space to himself, and he can probably thank the heat for that. There is no breeze today, and it’s silent but for the occasional cicada song coming from somewhere within the birches.

He lingers at the pond for several minutes after finishing his lunch before heading back to the office. Only, there is a wall of boxes blocking the path to his desk. In fact, they’re taking up almost the entire entryway. Cassian checks the addressee, though there is no doubt in his mind as to who they’re for: Jyn. Fucking. Erso. As if her usual antics aren’t enough, apparently she is now intent on adding _fire code violation_ to the list. Any modicum of peace he had gained at the pond vanishes.

“Excuse me, Andor,” comes her voice from behind, and she brushes by him to grab one of the boxes. She’s managed to find a dolly, and has transferred two of the boxes from the pile to the cart before he finds his voice.

“What are you doing?” His voice is low, a warning.

“What does it look like I’m doing?”

It’s obvious what she’s doing—moving the boxes out of the way and up to her lab—but that isn’t what Cassian meant, and she knows it.

“Why were these delivered here instead of to the lab?”

“I don’t know, Cassian, you’d have to ask the delivery guy, as I wasn’t here. Best guess, he couldn’t find anyone to sign for them upstairs and just dropped them in the easiest spot.”

“It would be the lazy one who brings your delivery.”

The last is said almost under his breath and while her back is to him as she retrieves another box, but she hears it nonetheless. She whirls to face him.

“And what is that supposed to mean?”

“Only that you seem to have something in common with our wayward delivery man.”

“What the hell is your problem? You’ve been riding my ass since I got here, and I know it’s not just about that damn printer because Wedge jams it just as often as I do!”

Cassian notes that she’s starting to sound more and more British with every sentence, a sure sign that Jyn is well and truly angry now. Her normal speaking voice holds only the hint of an accent (he had actually thought she was American for a while), but he knows his own accent gets thicker when he’s experiencing strong emotions. For all he knows, she’s making the same observation about him right now, because Cassian is also well and truly angry. The volume of this conversation has been steadily rising, and he has to make a conscious effort to not yell his next statement. 

“You leave problems for others to deal with simply because it would inconvenience you to deal with them yourself. You are not the only one in this Department who has important things to do.”

“Oh, that is rich, coming from you,” she scoffs. “Did you think I wouldn’t know it was you who left the precision balance covered in agar yesterday? Or how about last week when you signed up for two _long_ blocks of time with the centrifuge and then didn’t even use it! Leia was here until 3 am for her timepoints because you threw off her schedule! You’re no better than an undergrad.”

“What is going on here?”

Mon Mothma is standing mere feet away, but neither Cassian nor Jyn had noticed her approach. She must have been able to hear them from well down the hall, so she knows exactly what is going on here. They don’t break eye contact as they answer in unison, “Nothing.”

“Jyn, a word,” she states in a voice that demands obedience.

And then she’s gone, white skirts billowing behind her. Jyn is still glaring at him with fierce green eyes, and they’re standing very close to each other. Cassian doesn’t even remember when that happened.

“You can’t talk your way out of this, Andor.”

“I don’t have to.”

Realizing she shouldn’t keep her advisor waiting, Jyn breaks their stare first and trots after Mothma. Cassian slides the remaining boxes against the wall so they’ll be out of the way and tries to calm his mind.

Why should he care what she thinks?


	4. Siren

### Chapter 4: Siren

“Please, Cassian.”

“No.”

“You’re the best wingman.”

“Ask Luke.”

“He’s the worst.”

“Kay, then.”

A pause, “Ok, _he’s_ actually the worst.”

“I have work to do.”

“That is literally always what you say. Please, can you just take one night off? This is as much for you as it is for me.”

“How generous of you.”

“Hey, I’m not the one having sexually-charged arguments in the middle of the hallway. Maybe you’re the one who could use the lay.”

“The hell? How do you even know about that?”

“Not important. Interesting that you don’t deny its sexually-charged nature though.”

“Melshi.”

Melshi looks like he wants to press further, but something about Cassian’s face must make him think better of it. Realizing he’s not going to win any favors from Cassian by ribbing him about Jyn, Melshi switches tactics.

“Ok. You don’t have to be my wingman. Just come out to the bar. Have a few drinks. Watch some sports. You don’t take nearly enough downtime, and the scientist in you should know better than that. You _know_ there is a plethora of research out there about the importance of taking breaks.”

Cassian sighs, “Fine.”

And thus Cassian finds himself in a crowded bar on a Friday night for the first time all summer. He and Melshi had managed to claim a booth in the corner, and since Cassian had flatly refused to wingman, Melshi had ended up inviting most of the other males in the office. Now Wedge, Kay, Luke, and Cassian are splitting their time between pretending to be interested in the baseball game on TV and observing Melshi attempt to pick up various women on his own.

“Hey, Cassian, isn’t that your friend in the Geology Department?” asks Luke and gestures toward the door with his beer.

Cassian waves Baze over, and the older man joins them. They had met three years ago during the required orientation for new Teaching Assistants: Cassian was looking for a place to sit and had chosen a spot next to Baze because he had looked as grumpy as Cassian felt to be there. They’d been friends ever since.

“Glad you could make it. Chirrut?” asks Cassian as everyone shuffles to make room for Baze.

Baze shakes his grizzled head, “He’s on a dig in Jerusalem. Won’t be back until the fall.”

Melshi wanders back to their booth to greet Baze and announce that the dartboard is free. He, Wedge, Kay, and Luke decide to play, leaving just Baze and Cassian. The two men sit in companionable silence for several minutes watching the game and eating nachos until Cassian’s attention is once again drawn to the entrance of the bar.

“You have got to be kidding me.”

It’s Jyn. And she’s wearing heels.

Baze follows Cassian’s gaze, “What?”

“That’s her.”

“Her who?”

“Jyn.”

“Ah, the printer girl. Which one?”

“Dark jeans, black shirt. 2:00.”

It takes Baze a moment to locate her, and then “Hm. She’s attractive.”

“Her appearance is not the point. I cannot escape that woman.”

Jyn is leaning against the bar, laughing with a young man. His hair is long, pulled into a tail at the nape of his neck, and he’s wearing a pair of sunglasses on top of his head despite the fact that the sun had set several hours ago. Cassian thinks they may have come in together, but it doesn’t look like the man is actively engaged in trying to win her affections. Even as he watches, however, she’s approached by someone who clearly is. He supposes it isn’t surprising. For all his deflections with Melshi and Baze, Cassian can actually admit to himself that Jyn is an attractive woman, and right now she is dressed to draw attention from the opposite sex. Her jeans are form-fitting, but the shirt is not. It’s one of those loose scoop neck shirts with a lot of extra fabric in the front and cutouts on the arms, and it’s accented with a white crystal of some sort on a long thong around her neck. Jyn’s always favored the smokey eye look, but tonight she’s definitely turned that up a level, and she’s actually wearing her hair down. Yes, definitely attractive. But Cassian knows what she is.

It’s a moment before he notices Baze watching him watching her.

“Right. I’m going to get another beer,” Baze says.

He slides out of the booth and saunters over to the bar, finding a place suspiciously near Jyn. It isn’t long before Luke takes his place next to Cassian. 

“Melshi got a girl,” Luke explains before Cassian can even ask.

Cassian leans over a bit so he can see the rest of their group, and sure enough, Melshi has his hands on some poor woman’s arms to guide her aim with the dart. Kay looks like he desperately wants to comment on the cliché nature of the situation, but Wedge smacks his arm as soon as he opens his mouth.

“How’d that happen?”

“Not sure. She just walked up and asked him if he would teach her to play. So naturally I got ousted as his partner. Say, did you know Jyn’s here?”

“I was aware.”

“We should ask if she’d like to join us.”

“Something tells me she wouldn’t welcome an interruption right now.”

“Why don’t you like her?”

“You mean you do?” Cassian asks, incredulous.

“Well, sure. I mean, I don’t know her all that well yet, but she’s been really great so far. She’s not cleared for agent work yet, so she’s just been helping me and Leia a lot. Remember last week when my sister had that really late timepoint? Jyn stayed with her the whole time, even though she didn’t have to. I think Leia would’ve been there a lot later than she was without Jyn’s help. Plus she has a lot of good ideas, and she’s really good with the statistical software. And you should see her peer review—she’s utterly merciless. Have you read any of her papers?”

“Can’t say I have.”

“You should. I wondered at first why Dr. Mothma wanted her for our lab. After everything that happened with Dr. Gererra, I was a little worried that it was a bad idea, you know? But I don’t think so anymore. Not after working with her, and reading her stuff. It’s…elegant?” Luke shakes his head, unsure of the right word to use. “You should give her a chance. She’s actually pretty cool. Got a wicked sense of humor, too, when she chooses to use it. I think you’d like her.”

Baze returns from the bar with two beers and slides one to Cassian. “I signed us up for the next game of pool. And Cassian, if you’re going to go with bird-woman metaphors, I think ‘siren’ is probably more appropriate than ‘harpy’ when it comes to your printer girl.”

Thirty minutes later, Baze is solidly beating Cassian at pool. Thirty minutes after that, Cassian tries not to notice Jyn leaving the bar with one of the men who had been chatting her up (and he certainly doesn’t notice it’s a different one than the first). An hour after that, he’s home in his apartment looking up Jyn’s papers. 

Maybe it’s because he’s not quite sober, but Cassian has to agree with Luke’s earlier choice of words to describe her work: elegant.


	5. Booty/Bootie Dancing

### Chapter 5: Booty/Bootie Dancing

The remainder of the summer semester passes quietly. Cassian and Jyn have no more arguments in hallways, Jyn doesn’t verbally assault anymore of Dr. Draven’s undergrads on Cassian’s behalf, and Jyn doesn’t jam the printer nearly as much as she had at the start of the semester. (Cassian isn’t sure if she’s just gotten better about fixing it before he notices, or if she’s lost interest in needling him in this manner ever since he stopped showing how much it bothers him.) He has made a real effort to be courteous to her since that night in the bar when Drunk Cassian had appreciated her beautiful figures and tables. Sober Cassian also had to admit he appreciated these things, and now that he isn’t so caught up in their mutual pettiness toward each other, he has observed first-hand that Jyn is a more-than-adequate scientist. His change of heart had confused her at first, and she’d looked at him with suspicion during all their interactions for the better part of two weeks, but eventually she had accepted the olive branch. They aren’t friends, but there is a certain respect there now that makes Cassian think they someday could be.

In the brief respite between the summer and fall semesters, Cassian starts what will hopefully be one of the last major experiments in his graduate career. It’s also not one Cassian has been looking forward to. Draven had insisted on using WSB mice despite Cassian and Melshi’s extremely vocal protests (truthfully, it had been bordering on panic), so Cassian spends a good deal of time acclimating himself to just being able to handle the mice before he can even start the experiment. The last thing he needs is a _Yersinia pestis_ -infected mouse getting loose in the lab and the ensuing nightmare of paperwork and inspections that will follow. Once he’s comfortable, the experiment begins in earnest, with both he and Melshi putting in some long hours in the ABSL-3.

The hot-as-Hades July turns into an August so humid even Cassian is tempted to start wearing shorts into the lab just to be free of even a small bit of fabric sticking uncomfortably to his skin. He knows this confuses his labmates (“Aren’t you from _Mexico_ , Cassian?”), who think he should be used to this kind of weather. He knows a lot of people have a hard time envisioning his homeland without a bunch of cacti and/or white sand beaches, but Cassian is from Tlachichuca. It’s fairly temperate there, sometimes even downright cold. It snows, and there is a _glacier_ roughly 20 kilometers from where he grew up. He doesn’t bother pointing this out to them, and instead suffers in silence, even as Jyn convinces Leia to succumb to the power of the dark side and wear shorts. It is on one such sweltering day that Cassian find himself in a bit of a bind.

“Sorry, Cassian, there is no way I can make it in today,” comes Melshi’s voice on the other end of the line. “I think it’s food poisoning.”

They were supposed to be in the hot lab to dose some animals, and the whole experiment will be thrown off if Cassian doesn’t do the agent challenge _today_. With Melshi out, Cassian’s options are rather limited. Luke and Leia had some sort of family emergency they were off dealing with, Kay is useless when it comes to any science not involving a computer, Tynnra and Wedge have no animal experience, he will only ask Dr. Draven to help as an absolute last resort, and no one else is on their registry to be able to legally help him with the exception of…

Cassian tells Melshi he hopes he feels better and ends the call. He and Jyn might no longer be at each other’s throats, but he’s not sure they’re on good enough terms for him to be able to ask a favor like this. But it’s either her or Draven. He sighs and gets up from his desk, shoulders sagging. She’s sitting at her own desk staring at a paper and nibbling at the end of her pen. He clears his throat.

“Good morning, Jyn.”

She blinks as she looks up at him, “Good morning, Cassian.”

“You busy today?”

“Not particularly, no.”

“I, uh, I could use some help. In the BSL-3. With the mice. Luke told me you were good with the animals…”

“Are you asking for my help?”

“Yeah, I guess I am.”

“With your psychotic WSBs?”

“Yes.”

“I’ve never handled those before, Cassian.”

“I’ll do all the handling, but I could use some help with the exposures.”

She considers for a moment before responding, “Alright. When do you need me?”

He’s surprised she agreed so readily, “A little after noon. I need to finish prepping the inoculum. Meet me over there?”

“10-4. And you owe me food for my troubles.”

Cassian can’t argue with that.

* * *

At 12:10, Jyn is waiting for him at the entrance to the ABSL-3 suite. They both badge in to the anteroom and begin the donning procedure. Cassian notes Jyn has changed into pants and a scrub top and realizes belatedly that she’s probably always had these stashed for labwork. He removes his watch, and she does the same, along with the necklace he had seen her wearing that night at the bar. He begins pulling on some coveralls while she redoes her hair into a braid with practiced fingers and pulls on a scrub cap to keep her bangs out of her face. (Leia had quickly discovered that her elaborate hairstyles were simply not conducive to wearing a PAPR hood, and all the women have resorted to low ponytails or braids ever since; plus, he’s been told that there is almost nothing worse than having hair fall into your face while working when there is nothing you can do to fix it.) A minute later she’s joining him in pulling on all the body PPE, taping her gloves to her sleeves, and checking her PAPR for functionality before pulling the hood down over her face. She spins in a slow circle for him to check that everything is in place, and he does the same. With a nod to each other, they step into the hot lab.

It’s as though they’ve been working together for years. Jyn requires very little direction, for which Cassian is grateful. (He didn’t relish the thought of yelling extensive instructions to be heard over the constant dull roar of the PAPRs in their ears.) They quickly settle into a routine. He holds the mouse, she gently pipettes the inoculum for an intranasal exposure. They do several animals without incident. FN-2187 gives him a brief scare when she attempts a leap as soon as he opens her cage, but his reflexes are fortunately quite good and he soon has her scruffed. They are finished within a few hours, everything deconned, trash in the autoclave, and mouse cages returned to the appropriate racks in the right room.

Cassian and Jyn walk back to the anteroom. He reaches down to pull off one of his shoe covers, giving a tiny hop as he briefly loses his balance. 

“You’re not very good at that.”

He has to turn his whole head in order to actually see Jyn thanks to the limited visibility of his PAPR hood.

“Pardon?”

“Booty dancing. You’re not very good at it.”

Cassian freezes in the act of removing his other shoe cover. It’s a moment before he remembers that many of the students refer to the shoe covers as booties and that she’s referring to his awkward hopping while attempting to remove them. A few weeks ago he would have thought she was being malicious, but now he can see the corners of her lips twitch and the laughter in her eyes. 

“Perhaps not,” and he gives a small smile of his own before tossing the used booties into the trash and exiting to the anteroom. Jyn, he notes, removed her shoes covers without so much as a wobble.

They strip off their remaining PPE and wash up before retrieving the personal items they had set aside. Jyn clasps the necklace about her neck and tucks it back under her shirt before gracing him with a lopsided smirk.

“So. Where are you taking me to dinner?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~ I realize that even among English speakers we use all manner of colorful slang to describe things, so just in case the joke got lost in translation: booty = butt; booty dancing = twerking, or something akin to it. 
> 
> ~ The town of Tlachichuca serves as a common starting place for people wishing to climb Mexico’s highest mountain/volcano, which does indeed have glaciers. Its average high and low temperatures are 72 and 43°F (22 and 6°C) and don’t change a whole lot by month. However, I did find pictures of snow in the town.
> 
> ~ BSL-3: Biosafety Level 3; where you don’t quite need the “spacesuits” but do require more specialized personal protective equipment (PPE) including respiratory protection (in this case, in the form of a powered-air purifying respirator, or PAPR)
> 
> ~ ABSL-3: same as above, but with critters
> 
> ~ I’ve never worked in an ABSL-3, or with mice, so apologies for any inaccuracies. 
> 
> ~ The WSB strain of mouse, I have been told, is extremely feisty and a rather huge pain to work with. They have a characteristic white blaze on their heads that my source referred to as the Mark of the Beast, if that tells you anything.
> 
> ~ Someone actually recognized the pond in chapter 3 (yes, it’s a real place from my alma mater), which I find quite amusing. Good catch, Emily. I probably won’t be drawing too much more inspiration from that campus, though.
> 
> ~ This story may have to go on hiatus (or at least decreased updating) because I am a month away from being homeless and kind of need to focus on finding a place to live. And then moving into said place. I’ve also been having a hard time getting from Point A to Point B in this story, but I promise I’ll figure it out eventually.
> 
> ~ Thanks for reading, and sorry for the long author's note. :)


	6. Dr. Queso

### Chapter 6: Dr. Queso

They decide on a ramen place called Bespin on the outskirts of campus and sit outside after placing their orders to avoid the gaggle of undergrads crowding the air-conditioned interior of the restaurant. This early in the evening is still mildly unpleasant heat- and humidity-wise, but being inside with all the excited chatter is more unpleasant. Fortunately there is enough of a breeze that Jyn has to periodically brush her bangs out of her eyes. She’s back in her tank top and shorts, the crystal necklace once again exposed. It catches some of the sun’s rays, and the light is refracted into shards of rainbow on her chest. Cassian tries not to stare.

“So what’s the deal with your attack robot?” she asks after they’ve been sitting in silence for a few minutes. She’s watching people pass them by on the sidewalk and playing absently with her necklace.

“Attack robot?”

“Kay.”

“That’s a bit unfair.”

“Is it though? I’ve never seen him show an ounce of true emotion even when he’s belittling me, he’s obsessed with numbers and odds, and he’s viciously protective of you.”

“You clearly haven’t been in a journal club with him when the paper’s bioinformatics analysis was bad.”

“When would I have had that opportunity?”

“You will soon. I hear Mothma wants one for the Department this semester.”

“That’s beside the point. What’s his deal?”

Cassian shrugs even though she still isn’t looking at him to see. “We just rely on each other pretty closely for our work. It’s a sort of symbiosis: he can’t do his thing without the data I generate, and I’m nowhere near as good at the bioinformatics aspect as him. As for his quips, I think he’s just making up for all the lost time when he couldn’t put down his high school students.”

Jyn whips her head toward him. “You’re joking. Kay was a teacher?”

“Yeah, computer science. Mainly sophomores, I think.”

“With a name like his, that must have been brutal. And to not be able to give back as good as he got. No wonder he’s repressed.”

She shakes her head and chuckles lightly, bangs falling back into her eyes.

“What do you mean, ‘with a name like his’? Kay isn’t exactly odd.”

“Seriously? Dr. Kay Tso?” She slowly enunciates each part of the name before continuing, an incredulous look on her face. “Dr. Queso? Honestly, Cassian, aren’t you Mexican?”

Cassian blinks. He has known Kay for years, has introduced him on countless occasions, and it had never once occurred to him that his exacerbating, sarcastic, brilliant friend/colleague is named after a dairy product. He wonders if Kay realized this when he picked his “American” name because people had a hard time pronouncing his given name. (Kuo doesn’t seem too hard to Cassian, but apparently it had been butchered enough for Kay to go with something else.) Suddenly some of the bemused expressions of people meeting Kay for the first time make sense. Cassian had always assumed it was just because Kay was, well, _Kay_ , but he supposes he would be confused too if he were introduced to a Dr. Cheese.

He laughs at the absurdity, and it’s genuine. After a moment, Jyn laughs with him. They’re still laughing when the server brings them their noodles. He slides the bowls to each of them, tells them to enjoy, and begins to turn away before doing a double-take.

“Jyn?”

It takes a moment for her face to register recognition, and her lips contort into an awkward smile that would have been passable had Cassian not just seen her true one.

“Oh, hi. Um…”

“Lando.”

“Lando, yes, of course. How are you?”

Lando is giving Cassian some serious side-eye, but his winning customer service smile is still intact.

“I’m doing alright. Business is booming since school started back. I own this place, you know.”

“I…was not aware of that.”

“Yes, well. I should get back to my customers. You two enjoy. Call me any time, Jyn. And I mean _any_ time.”

There is a moment of silence after Lando breezes away while Jyn tries to school her features back into anything besides embarrassment. Cassian does her the courtesy of digging into his ramen and pretending he didn’t just meet her one-night stand. After a bit, Jyn’s phone pings with an incoming text message. She ignores it at first, but three more come in quick succession. She reaches for her device, swipes in the passcode, and scans the messages. With a sigh, she taps out a quick reply and places her phone back on the table.

“So Leia is on Tinder now,” she says.

“I know. Luke won’t stop complaining about it.”

“He’s right to worry. Have you seen some of the sleeze balls on that app?”

“Well, Melshi uses Tinder, so…”

“She just texted me that she has a date tonight. Wanted to make sure someone knew where she was in case she gets kidnapped. And did you just make a joke?”

He smiles, “Melshi is a good scientist, but I do not envy the women who receive his attentions. He keeps multiple girlfriends simultaneously. I can’t even tell you how many times his car has been keyed by angry exes.”

“God, I’d do a lot worse than key his car, if that were me.”

“Oh?”

“I’ve wanted to hit Melshi with a shovel since the first day I got here,” she replies. “I don’t think he realized I was a new graduate student, and he used the worst pick-up line.”

“Dare I ask?”

“’Hey, baby, I wish I was DNA helicase so I could unzip those genes.’” Her man-voice impression of Melshi is so ridiculous that Cassian nearly aspirates some of his ramen. “And then he waggled his eyebrows, Cassian. It took a great deal of self-control for me to not kidney punch him right there in the middle of the hall.”

Cassian laughs at the mental image. Having been on the receiving end of Jyn Erso’s wrath, he can easily picture her barely-concealed rage as she struggles not to wipe a lascivious smirk off Melshi’s face. He wonders how Melshi has survived this long.

“At any rate,” she continues, “he apologized later and has had the good sense to not speak to me since, but still. I’ve never met a Ruescott I could trust.”

“You’ve met other Ruescotts?”

“No, n of 1.”

“Your sample size is hardly large enough to draw any reliable conclusions.”

“Perhaps I should put out a flyer? The Psychology Department offers credit to study participants. I can see it now: ‘Seeking Ruescotts for psychological study investigating correlation between name and whether you’re an asshole.’ What do you think?”

“Phrasing might need a little work. I don’t think the deans allow profanity on written materials. And you should mention the compensation. A can of Axe body spray, perhaps?”

“I like the way you think, Andor.”

Her smile, the real one, is back now. They continue to talk long after they’ve both finished their meals and the summer sun has given way to twilight and then full-dark. They speculate on how Leia’s Tinder date is going. (“His name is Han, Cassian. _Han_.”) Whether Dr. Mothma owns any clothing that isn’t white. (“All I’m saying is in the six years I’ve known her, the closest she’s gotten is a pair of khakis.”) If Professor Kenobi will _ever_ retire. (“Does he even know what CRISPR is? He’s just so old-school.”) The fact that Mothma wants Jyn to have enough data to submit an abstract for the East American Defense Understanding conference next spring. (“Presenting at EADU is a big deal, Jyn. You should definitely try for it.”)

They do not talk about themselves, but Cassian has learned a decent amount about Jyn despite this. Luke is right a second time: he does like her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The DNA helicase line is actually my favorite science pick-up line. :)


	7. Journal Club

### Chapter 7: Journal Club

Mon Mothma announces her intent to start a journal club in the form of an email sent to the entire Department that heavily implies she’ll be taking note of anyone not in attendance. It’s not at the best time for Cassian, but she’s a member of his committee, so he knows better than to get on her bad side. That doesn’t mean he’s about to volunteer to present first though.

“Who do you suppose she’ll voluntell for the first one?” asks Jyn after she’s read the email.

She and Leia had spent all morning in the ABSL-3 and are finally breaking for food. Cassian is the only one currently in the office, most of the other students having gone out for lunch or run to class. Leia is about to answer her when she stops in her tracks and tilts her head ever so slightly to listen. Without a word, Leia darts around the corner toward the back of the office, Cassian hot on her heels, leaving Jyn standing at her desk looking confused. A moment after they’ve rounded the corner, Cassian hears someone enter the office area.

“Ah, Jyn. I trust you saw my email about the journal club? Excellent. How would you feel about presenting first? Yes? Excellent. Choose a paper by the end of the week.”

A moment later Jyn is glaring at them. “That is unfair. I haven’t been here long enough to recognize her walk yet. You should have given me a heads-up.”

“Better you than us, Jyn. Consider it your trial by fire,” replies Leia, smirking.

“Oh, I will.” Jyn is smiling darkly.

She sends the paper later that day, and Cassian is only a few pages in when he realizes why she’s picked it. Kay is going to have a conniption fit.

* * *

“Cassian, have you seen this monstrosity Jyn Erso has selected for discussion?” Kay rages, slamming the paper down onto his desk.

Cassian notices how heavily inked the margins are. One page has the word **WRONG** written twice in large letters, underlined, and with exclamation points, arrows pointing to the offending parts of the figure. Cassian immediately recognizes it as the figure he knew would draw Kay’s ire. He also recognizes that Jyn has done this very much on purpose. _You clearly haven’t been in a journal club with him when the paper’s bioinformatics analysis was bad_ , he had said. He should have known Jyn would take that as a challenge. Regardless, he’s a bit impressed that she knows enough about _Yp_ to have caught the error, because while it was egregious to him and Kay as experts on _pestis_ , that bacterium and its virulence genes aren’t exactly Jyn’s area of expertise.

“And the media got ahold of it, of course! Every major outlet has some nitwit reporting that New York subways are rife with plague and anthrax bacteria. Irresponsible science at its finest!”

“That’s probably why she picked it,” Cassian lies.

“Jyn Erso leading a discussion on scientific responsibility and integrity? No one coming from Saw Gerrera’s band of rogues has that right.”

“I have every right,” comes Jyn’s voice from behind them. “Who better to spearhead that discussion than someone who has experienced first-hand what happens when our unspoken rules are broken?”

“Interesting. Because from here it doesn’t look like you were impacted at all,” sneers Kay.

“Not _impacted_? I lost _everything_ when Saw was discredited, Kay! My research, my reputation, my friends. Even my family had doubts about my involvement, and—“

Jyn bites off the end of her sentence, and she looks like she knows she’s just revealed much more than she intended. Cassian’s mind races as he tries to think of a way to defuse the situation, but Kay ( _damn_ his lack of social skills and inability to read a situation) presses on.

“And what of your involvement, Jyn?”

Jyn closes her eyes and breathes in and out several times before calmly responding, “As the investigation has shown, and as I have consistently maintained, I was not involved in any way. I had no knowledge of what Saw was doing. I wasn’t even there.”

The last is new information to Cassian (what does she mean, _she wasn’t even there_?).

“I find that answer vague and unconvincing.”

“Your lack of faith doesn’t make my statement any less true.”

There is a moment of tense silence while the two stare each other down (Cassian is noticing a theme to their interactions) before Jyn turns to Cassian.

“I didn’t come here for your bioinformatician to pass judgement on my past. I wanted to pick your brain about the article. Do you have a few minutes?”

Cassian nods and follows Jyn out of the office without meeting Kay’s gaze. He doesn’t say anything when they walk outside, or when she leads him across the quad to Ecology’s koi pond. She sits down on an unoccupied side of the wall, swinging her legs over to dangle just above the water’s surface. Cassian sits next to her, a respectful distance between them, and waits.

“I stumbled upon that paper by accident. I googled _Yp_ , and a bunch of news articles addressing it popped up. Apparently prominent bioinformaticians and government scientists are already calling for a retraction. I don’t know a lot about _Yp_ genetics, but there was something about how that gene is highly conserved?”

Cassian nods and confirms, “Yeah, the fact that they saw so many SNPs probably means it wasn’t _pestis_ at all, even though it mapped back to it. Who knows what they actually found. The authors should issue a clarification. Their conclusions were way too speculative. And you can’t just claim that there’s plague bacteria in the subway system and not expect people to panic.”

They lapse into silence again. Cassian can hear the clocktower downtown dully chiming the hour, and students pour out of various buildings as their classes are released.

“It was not my intent to start an ethics discussion. I just wanted to see what he was like when he read bad bioinformatics. I guess now I know.”

“He was out of line. I’ll say something to him when we get back.”

“You don’t have to.”

“Kay and I are a team. He lets me know when I’m brooding, I let him know when he’s being an ass. And he’s definitely being an ass.”

“Earning people’s trust is always going to be an uphill battle for me, isn’t it?”

It’s really more a statement of fact than a question, but he answers her anyway, “Probably. But isn’t it always?”

“Not like this,” she replies sadly.

And he understands. Cassian is not one to easily trust anyone. But there is a difference between not trusting someone until they’ve given you a reason to, and not trusting them because you assume they are inherently untrustworthy. Jyn falls into the second category through guilt by association. Her character will always bear the stain of Saw Gerrera’s transgressions. Even now under the tutelage of Mon Mothma, who is world-renowned and pure as the clothes she wears, Jyn will not be able to escape Saw’s shadow. It isn’t fair. And Cassian is a bit ashamed that he is just one more person she had had to defend her honor against.

“I just wish people would believe me.”

“I believe you.”

His reply is quiet, but said with conviction. Jyn is staring at him, a small smile tugging at the corner of her lips and a glint of something resembling hope in her eyes. In the back of his mind, Cassian knows that they are surrounded by people, but his world has narrowed to just the two of them. He wants very badly to reach across the distance between them but refrains from doing so. Their friendship is still new, fragile, and he doesn’t want to ruin it. Instead he returns her small smile. She lifts her hand from the wall and lets it briefly hover over his. Perhaps thinking better of it herself, though, she lets it fall back, allowing only the barest brush of their pinky fingers. 

They sit like that for several minutes, staring into the pond, each lost in their own thoughts. Before long, the bustle of class change dies down, and Cassian is shaken out of himself by excited shouts from the quad behind them. A group of undergrads has started a pick-up game of ultimate Frisbee. Shirts versus skins.

“Wanna see if they’ll let us play?” asks Jyn, back to her impish self now that their moment of introspection has passed.

“Sure,” he replies.

If Jyn thinks he’s all brain and no brawn, she’s in for a surprise. And if he gets some satisfaction from her sideways glances when he joins the skins team, what of it?

* * *

_Two gaz’d into a pool, he gaz’d and she,_  
_Not hand in hand, yet heart in heart, I think_  
_Pale and reluctant on the water’s brink…_  
_Two wistful faces craving each for each,_  
_Resolute and reluctant without speech_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~ The closing lines are part of “An Echo from Willowwood” by Christina Rossetti. I feel like that poem in its entirety perfectly describes canon Jyn and Cassian (if you have never read it, I highly recommend it), so I decided to borrow a part of it for this scene.
> 
> ~ The contentious paper that gets Kay so riled up is a real paper that created quite a stir several years ago. The bioinformaticians I work with were livid; I have *never* been in such a lively journal club. Fortunately the authors did back off on some of their more sensational conclusions and publish an erratum.


	8. Stardust

### Chapter 8: Stardust

On the morning of September 24th, Cassian awakens with a massive hangover and very fuzzy recollections from around 8:30 last night onwards. Yesterday was Jyn’s birthday, and Leia had suggested they get Mexican because— _tequila_.

There are a few things he does remember with vivid clarity: Jyn glaring at him the entire 45 seconds it took the wait staff to drop a sombrero on her head and sing their version of “Feliz cumpleaños,” despite his best efforts to play dumb at who could have alerted them; Jyn semi-humoring Chirrut as he tried to explain her astrological natal chart, while still wearing the sombrero (“I’m practically the anti-Libra, Chirrut, so what does that tell you about trusting horoscopes?”); sharing an Uber with Leia and Jyn afterwards, where the two women spent the entire time zealously trash-talking each other about which one of them would win in a game of Settlers of Catan, Jyn _still_ wearing the sombrero. 

Cassian slowly gathers his scattered thoughts and rolls out of bed with a groan. He’s not sure if the high of the evening was worth the pain of this morning. He’s going to have to walk to work, as he left his car on campus. And also call the restaurant to apologize for stealing their sombrero.

He makes his way painfully through his morning routine, and by the time he’s taken a shower and had several glasses of water he’s no longer feeling like he got run over by a semi. He really should have known better than to indulge so much, especially with all he has to do this morning. As it turns out, Cassian’s terrible neighbors have a bed bug problem, an infestation so bad that his landlady had opted to have his entire building treated. Fumigations are a new experience for Cassian, but he is nothing if not thorough when it comes to following instructions. Especially when the price for disobedience is a swarm of blood-sucking arthropods becoming his new roommates. Thus, he has been prepping his apartment for today for the past week using all the pointers the pest control company had suggested, but there are still some last-minute things to do.

Cassian gives his apartment one last look-over, grabs his overnight bag, and heads out, waving at Mrs. Kanata where she stands with a man representing the fumigation company in the complex’s parking lot. 

“All set, Cassian?” she calls.

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Where are you staying?”

“With a labmate,” he replies. 

He isn’t, actually, but he doesn’t need her fussing over him. He knows that just about anyone in the office would let him crash on their sofa for the night, but he doesn’t like to impose. Cassian is actually going to be sleeping on the back seat of the departmental van that the graduate students have commandeered for their office. He remembers with some satisfaction how Jyn had sweet-talked Luke and Wedge into moving the seat from the hallway into the office after it had been removed from the van to make space for some equipment. (Mothma has yet to enquire on its whereabouts.) 

When Cassian arrives in the office, he finds Jyn, Luke, and Leia at their desks. Luke is pounding a Gatorade, Leia is rubbing her temples, and Jyn is wearing sunglasses. Luke acknowledges him with a slight nod of his head, followed quickly by a grimace. Cassian takes some small pleasure that he isn’t the only one suffering this morning. (Misery loves company.) He throws his bag under his desk and sets up his laptop. An email from Dr. Draven awaits him. He’s _finally_ read the latest draft of Cassian’s paper and wants to meet sometime in the afternoon. That should give Cassian enough time to check on his mice and recover sufficiently from this hangover.

* * *

“Why didn’t you include a discussion of the Pearson paper from two years ago?”

“It was in the last draft. You told me to take it out.”

“Did I?” A pause. “Put it back in.”

“You’re sure?”

“Yes, it should definitely be included.”

Cassian sighs as he leaves Draven’s office. There is no doubt in his mind that Draven will tell him to remove the Pearson reference again in the next draft. These back-and-forths are par for the course, but that doesn’t make them any less frustrating. He’s been trying to get this manuscript submitted since late July, but Draven keeps wanting to tweak little things or add data from supplementary experiments. Cassian understands that he’s trying to anticipate the reviewers, but right now all he wants to do is submit the paper and see what kind of feedback they get. The science is solid, and the extra data doesn’t add much.

It’s much later than he was expecting when he finally returns to the office. He had been cloistered in Draven’s office for a few hours discussing not just the draft, but also his latest experiments, what he should submit when EADU sends their call for abstracts next month, and why he hasn’t started writing the literature review for his dissertation yet. Draven had told him to get on that and given him his very best “I am very disappointed in you, Cassian” look.

Cassian works on addressing Draven’s comments for a while before starting on the lit review. Before he knows it he’s alone in the office. Everyone involved in last night’s celebrations appears to have called it an early day and slunk home to nurse the last vestiges of hangovers. Cassian vaguely wishes he was one of them. Suddenly his plan to sleep on the van seat doesn’t seem very appealing. Plus he has a nagging feeling that he’s forgotten to do something today.

Around 7:30 he deems it safe to change into his sleep clothes without being discovered by any professors or fellow students. He brushes his teeth and washes his face in the men’s room, and returns to the office. He may not be able to go home, but he can at least turn in early. He balls up his jacket to serve as a pillow and borrows the blanket that Leia keeps draped over the back of her chair now that colder weather is approaching before flipping off the lights to the office. Cassian settles onto the seat as best he can and closes his eyes.

Only to have the lights flipped back on a few minutes later just as he’s dozed off.

“Cassian?”

Jyn is standing in the doorway, hand still poised on the light switch.

“Ah, hello, Jyn. What brings you here so late?” He winces internally.

“I have that late class on Thursdays. Just finished dinner. Normally I just go straight home, but I left something, so here I am. Are you sleeping here?”

“No. No, I just have a timepoint. Figured I’d catch a few hours’ sleep.”

“You’re wearing pajama bottoms.”

“I may as well be comfortable while I do it.”

“Cassian, you’re sleeping here.”

He sighs, defeated and ready for her to start teasing him. “Yes. My neighbors have bed bugs.”

“Ok?”

“My whole building is being fumigated. I can’t go home until tomorrow evening.”

“So instead of asking one of us to let you stay over, you decided you would rather sleep here? Cassian, that is ridiculous.”

“I didn’t want to impose…”

“You’re coming home with me. I have a perfectly comfortable sleeper sofa.”

“What? No, I couldn’t possibly—“

Jyn walks past him and grabs his laptop off his desk. She shoves it into her bag along with the textbook she had ostensibly come here to retrieve.

“This is coming home with me. I may just forget to bring it back tomorrow. If you want to ensure it makes it, you should come with me as well.”

She walks out of the office and turns toward the exit to the parking lot. Cassian knows Jyn wouldn’t do anything to his laptop, but he’s just as sure she would have no qualms about holding it hostage. He hastily re-folds Leia’s blanket, grabs his overnight bag and backpack, and trots after Jyn. She’s waiting for him outside.

“Good choice. Get in the car.”

Cassian climbs into the olive Jeep she indicates. Somehow it doesn’t surprise him that Jyn drives a beater car with a stick shift. 

“You would really rather spend the night on the backseat of a van than ask a friend for a favor?” she asks.

“I once made the mistake of sleeping at Kay’s place. Learned my lesson on that one. I was going to ask Luke, but ever since he started dating Mara, I’ve felt a little weird being over there at night. Same with Leia. Seems like an invasion of privacy.”

Jyn’s eyes are focused on the road, but he sees the eye roll nonetheless, “God, I can’t stand Han. I don’t get what Leia sees in him.”

“Have you told her that?”

“Of course I have! She can do so much better than some sleazy guy with ‘roguish charm’ she met on Tinder.”

Cassian privately thinks that “sleazy pilot with roguish charm” is probably better than “sleazy noodle-shop owner with roguish charm,” and that _Jyn_ can do much better, but he keeps his mouth shut. Where is this reaction even coming from? He shouldn’t have anything against Lando.

Jyn pulls in to her apartment complex and shuts off the car. The exterior of her building seems to have a lot in common with her Jeep, and he’s fairly certain the two teenagers in the corner of the lot are engaged in a drug deal. Jyn very pointedly ignore them as she leads him into the building. Cassian suddenly remembers an overheard conversation where Jyn was apologizing to Leia for being late one morning, saying that she had witnessed an attempted break-in and needed to give a statement to the police. Mrs. Kanata’s place isn’t exactly prime real estate, but he’s never really worried about crime in his area. He knows that of everyone in the office, Jyn is the most equipped to physically defend herself (she’s reached the fourth dan in Jiu-Jitsu), but there’s still a pang of worry for her.

Jyn unlocks her door, flicks on a light, and leads him inside. She shuts the door behind them, and he notes the double deadbolt and chain. The space is small, but it has a homey feel. The living room area is dominated by a sofa and small coffee table facing a modestly-sized flatscreen TV. There’s a small desk in the corner scattered with highlighted and marked-up papers. The bathroom appears to be through her bedroom, so Cassian is glad that Jyn is an early riser. What really draws his attention, however, is the animal cage positioned in the space reserved for a small kitchen table.

“Could you let the rabbit out?” Jyn asks as she shucks her light jacket and deposits the bag containing their laptops and her textbook onto the desk.

Cassian drops his bag next to the sofa and wanders over to the cage. A large mottled white and gray rabbit stares back at him and begins to gnaw at the bars of the cage impatiently. He locates the latch and opens the door. The rabbit happily hops out and begins sniffing at his shoes. It stands on its haunches, and Cassian swears it’s trying to get a look at his face. He bends down and slowly reaches to pet it.

“Management lets you keep a rabbit here?”

“Management doesn’t know.”

Cassian laughs. “Secret rabbit?”

“Secret rabbit,” she agrees.

“What’s its name?”

“Stardust.” 

When he looks up at her for the unusual name, she’s smiling and, perhaps sensing his question, says, “My niece named him.”

“You have siblings then?”

She pauses momentarily before answering. “In a manner of speaking.” 

She pauses again as if considering explaining her answer and adds simply, “Foster siblings. Kes is really the only one I kept in contact with though.”

Jyn wanders off, and Cassian duly notes the end to that particular conversation. She rummages around in what must be her linen closet and returns with a stack of sheets and blankets. Together they move her coffee table out of the way and open up the sofa bed. He helps her make up the bed and assures her that the throw pillow is more than sufficient for his head. Jyn tells him to make himself at home and disappears into her bedroom to take a shower. 

Cassian feels a bit awkward now that he’s alone. She had fed Stardust before going into the bathroom, so the rabbit is munching away on a small pile of vegetables, and Cassian knows better than to get between an animal and its food. He doesn’t want to turn on the TV, and Jyn hadn’t given him her wifi password, so he’s not sure what to do. He turns his attention to her desk to see what sorts of things she’s reading right now. In addition to the scattered scientific articles, it also appears Jyn is in the middle of grading Mothma’s latest round of exams. A familiar red pen catches his eye, and this is what he’s staring at when Jyn emerges from her shower several minutes later. She’s wearing an oversized Red Cross t-shirt declaring that she has donated blood at some point in the past and pajama bottoms with the Starship Enterprise on them.

“I wouldn’t have pegged you for a Trekkie.”

“ _Firefly_ is actually more my style, but who doesn’t love a good episode of _TNG_?”

“Fair point. Where did you get this?” he asks, holding up the pen he is 98% sure is his.

“I…found it,” she deflects, and then at his raised eyebrow, “On your desk.”

“I wondered where this had gotten off to.”

“Sorry, my red pen ran out of ink. I really only meant to borrow it.”

“That’s alright. I get plenty of pens from the vendors trying to sell stuff to the lab.”

It is at this moment when Jyn’s front door slams open, and a young man darts inside. Cassian and Jyn are both startled, but it appears as though the aggressor is just as startled.

“What the hell, Bodhi?” Jyn demands as soon as she’s recovered.

“I heard a man’s voice,” the intruder stammers.

“So you thought the most appropriate course of action was to barge in here? What if we’d been having sex?” 

Cassian shoots her a mortified look, but Jyn doesn’t notice. Her full attention is on Bodhi.

“I thought--you never--you never bring them back here. This wouldn’t be an issue if you locked your door, Jyn! I thought you were being robbed. Owen and Beru had a home invasion yesterday. Thugs roughed them up a bit. Kicked their door right in.”

“Then what good is locking it?”

“Jyn, that’s--you should really--just lock your door!” Bodhi turns to Cassian. “Back me up on this, Mr…?”

“Cassian. Cassian Andor.”

“The printer guy? You’re not what I’d pictured. I’m Rook. Bodhi. That is, I’m Bodhi Rook.”

Bodhi extends a hand, and Cassian shakes it. He thinks Bodhi looks a bit familiar, but he can’t place him.

“Don’t you have some place to be, Bodhi?” Jyn asks pointedly.

“Not really.”

“We were just going to bed.”

“Oh. Oh! I didn’t realize! I’ll just…I’ll just go then and let you two get back to…whatever. Lock your door!”

This last is said as he lets himself out of Jyn’s apartment. She stalks to the door and locks it.

“Bodhi is a sweetheart, but sometimes I just want to shake him,” Jyn says with a sigh.

“Well, he’s right about locking your door. Does this happen often? The break-ins, I mean.”

“There’ve been a few in the area since I moved in back in June. Five, I guess, now that the Larses have been hit. The other four were just smash and grabs; a home invasion is much more worrisome.”

“It’s good you have a neighbor like Bodhi, then.”

“Yeah, I guess so. He’s too good for a dump like this, though. Sometimes he gets heckled by the older teenagers who live here. He won’t let me say anything on his behalf, but those little jackasses learned pretty quickly to leave us alone when we’re together at least.”

Cassian can imagine how they had learned that.

“Anyways,” she continues, “Bodhi also works at the University. He’s a lab tech over in the Physics Department.”

“You know, Wedge actually used to work over in the Physics Department before he decided molecular microbiology and immunology were more to his liking. Maybe they know each other.”

Jyn covers a yawn as she replies, “Maybe. I think I’m headed to bed. Do you need anything before we turn in for the night?”

Cassian assures her he will be fine, and Jyn starts hunting for Stardust, who at some point between Jyn’s shower and Bodhi’s intrusion had finished his dinner and left his cage. She finds him nestled in Cassian’s bag. After returning the rabbit to his dwelling, Jyn turns off the lights and enters her bedroom. Cassian can hear her getting settled, and then silence reigns. He is just about to fall asleep when Jyn’s voice calls to him from the darkness.

“Hey Cassian, did we steal a sombrero last night?”

He knew there was something he was forgetting to do today.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I should be packing. But instead I wrote this [long for me] chapter.
> 
> I do want to thank everyone who’s still following this fic. I’ve really enjoyed reading your comments and knowing that the depiction of grad school has resonated.


	9. Scooped

### Chapter 9: Scooped

Cassian is abruptly awakened the next morning by Jyn’s front door closing. He cranes his neck over the back of the sofa to see a sweaty Jyn kicking off her shoes. He glances at his watch to confirm that it is indeed an ungodly hour to be _returning_ from a run.

“Good morning, sleepyhead!” she sing-songs in a voice that he suspects is supposed to be teasing but he finds oddly endearing. “Did you sleep alright? Stardust didn’t keep you awake, did he?”

“You were right, this is a perfectly comfortable sleeper sofa. Definitely an upgrade from the van seat. And no, your rabbit settled down fairly quickly.”

“Good. Let me just shower, and then we can eat. There’s cereal on the counter, and I’m about 75% sure the milk is still good. Or you can see if there’s anything worthwhile in the fridge, but fair warning, there probably isn’t.”

“Sounds good,” he smiles, and she returns it.

Cassian wanders into the kitchen and opens up the fridge. It’s fairly sparse: the promised milk that is a few days past its sell-by date but smells fine, a bunch of kale, some salsa, a shriveled zucchini, five eggs, half a bag of shredded cheddar cheese, and a case of Coke Zero. Fortunately Cassian has always prided himself on his cooking skills, and he has everything he needs for some passable omelets. He rummages through Jyn’s drawers until he finds a knife and cutting board, quickly dices up the sad zucchini, and has the first omelet started by the time he hears the shower turn off. Jyn emerges from her room, dressed but hair still wet and no makeup to speak of, just as he slides the second omelet onto a plate. She leans over the counter and watches as he tops the eggs with cheese and salsa and places a plate in front of her.

“You cook,” she states.

“I will assume by the state of your refrigerator that you do not?”

“Let’s just say I eat a lot of raw vegetables.”

Cassian actually had noticed that about her lunches.

“I was saving that zucchini, you know,” she says as she cuts off a piece of her omelet.

“Oh, I’m sorry! You implied everything was fair game and—“ he sees her smile as she stuffs a forkful of egg into her mouth, “—and you’re joking.”

“You put my zucchini to much better use that I would have. This is delicious. I should let you stay over more often. You’re a very considerate houseguest.”

“My mother would be proud.”

Cassian winces. He isn’t sure why he brought up his mother. He doesn’t talk about his family (too painful). Not to the therapist after it had happened. Not to his friends. Not to anyone. 

Perhaps sensing his discomfort, Jyn lets the comment slide. “I’m afraid I haven’t been the best host. I’m sure you need the bathroom to get ready. I’ll clean up here.”

Cassian nods, polishes off the last of his breakfast, and gathers his change of clothes from his bag. He’s almost completely undressed when there’s a gentle knock on the bathroom door. He opens it to find Jyn holding a towel. Her eyes slide down to his boxer shorts and then back up to his face.

“Pikachu?” she asks with a smirk.

“A white elephant gift from Leia at last year’s holiday party. I don’t think she expected me to wear them.”

“Gotta catch ‘em all, Cass,” Jyn’s smirk grows even more pronounced, and she tosses him the towel. “Could you hand me the hairdryer and brush behind you?”

Cassian showers quickly after she leaves and completes his morning routine. Jyn is sitting on her bed drying her hair when he leaves the bathroom.

“I won’t be too much longer, but the wifi password is ‘stardust,’ with dollar signs instead of the S’s. My network is ‘Rogue One.’ And before you comment on that, you should know that Bodhi picked the name.”

* * *

They arrive in the parking lot at the same time as Leia, who looks askance at the two of them climbing out of Jyn’s car. Jyn ignores Leia’s pointed looks and simply greets her labmate as if there is nothing at all unusual about this scenario. Leia turns her gaze to Cassian, and he decides to follow Jyn’s lead and not offer any explanations.

Cassian makes a pot of coffee and sits down to start his day, much earlier than usual. He always arrives in to work at a reasonable hour, but he’s really more of a night owl. People like Jyn and the Organa twins are baffling to him. Still, though, it’s kind of nice to have his first cup of coffee be fresh (usually it’s been sitting for a bit by the time he gets in) and have nothing but the quiet tapping of laptop keys from only a few other people instead of the full office. 

He spends a quiet morning working several references into his lit review and is considering taking a short break when his PubCrawler email comes in. Cassian opens it and scans down the list. There are only three results today, two of which aren’t super relevant and the last of which makes his heart stop. With growing dread, Cassian clicks the link to the third paper and scans over the abstract. 

His mutant.

His animal model. 

Not his paper.

Cassian’s gaze shifts from the abstract to the authors. Orson Krennic, Wilhuff Tarkin, and Darren Vader.

He’s been scooped. By _Orson Krennic_.

Cassian once read a book about talking rabbits. They loved to tell stories and had their own language. In the rabbit language, they had a saying: _going tharn_. A rabbit went tharn when it was caught in the headlights of a car, or so terrified by a predator that it couldn’t move. A tharn rabbit was so distraught that it simply froze. Not because it had accepted the inevitable, but because it couldn’t process what was happening to it. It just…shut down. Absurdly, this is the single thought Cassian’s shocked brain latches onto. He’d gone tharn.

“Cassian, I brought back your pen. Sorry again about…Cassian? What’s wrong?”

He can’t muster the strength to look at Jyn, so he simply nods at his laptop. She crouches down next to him and looks at him for several heartbeats. Out of the corner of his eye he can see the concern written on her face. After a moment she looks to his laptop. He turns his head slightly to look at her. Watches as her eyes flit across and down the screen, then back up to the authors, just as his had. He sees the exact moment that everything registers, and he can’t look at her anymore.

“That little shit,” she says with such venom that a passersby would have thought it was she who had been scooped. “Cassian, how bad does this screw you over?”

When he doesn’t reply, she takes his face in her hands and gently turns him to face her. He sees no pity in her eyes, for which he is grateful, only a fierce determination.

“Cassian,” and the way she says his name, the perfect blend of soft and firm, brings him out of his stupor, “what do you need to do? What is your first step from here?”

He takes a deep breath in and releases it, focuses on her words. “I need to read the whole paper.”

“Good.”

Jyn releases his face, and he’s almost embarrassed at his reaction. But he isn’t, not really, because he knows Jyn of all people understands what it feels like to work for years on something only to have it ripped away. If Krennic’s paper is what it appears to be, a not-insignificant portion of his dissertation is now useless. He will not be able to defend and graduate in the spring as he and Draven had planned.

“I need to print the paper,” he says, and a guilty expression crosses Jyn’s features as she stands.

“Ok, just give me a second to…fix something.”

Jyn disappears behind the printer, and Cassian hears her frantically unjamming the machine. 

At least some things are constant.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I moved this week, hence my warned-of posting hiatus. It was not a pleasant experience. I seriously do not understand people who enjoy moving. Like, what is there to like about this whole horrible, stressful process?
> 
> But anyways, I’ll try to be back to more frequent posts. Thanks to all those still following. I get really, really happy when I see a comment and get the kudos mail. :D


	10. Work work work work work work

### Chapter 10: Work work work work work work

The weeks following The Scoop are somewhat of a blur. Cassian does the only thing he can do given the situation: he works. Hard. He and Melshi revisit their timeline and max out how many animals they think they can handle at a time. It will be a grueling schedule, but Cassian will be damned before getting scooped again. Krennic may have beaten him to publish the one mutant, but fortunately Cassian’s latest experiments are comparison studies, and all his data so far suggests his still-novel live attenuated vaccine strain elicits a stronger immune response. He’s also started to see results showing lasting immunity with both strains, which Krennic hadn’t had the time to show. If only Cassian had been a little faster in his scheduling, if only he hadn’t been focused on those side-studies Draven had wanted for his latest manuscript, if only, if only, if only… 

The worst thing is, Krennic had probably used Cassian’s ideas from his talk at last year’s EADU conference to jumpstart his research. It’s a dirty move, but one that would be almost impossible to prove given how closely their research is aligned. Cassian feels a little sick every time he thinks about having to cite Krennic when he publishes his own work comparing the two mutants, but he swallows down his anger and uses it to fuel his work fervor. 

The one silver lining in this whole debacle is that it seems to have rallied the entire Department. Everyone has been offering him assistance where possible, even at the expense of their own research. (Jyn and Leia even loan him their undergrads to help him with the mindless prep work.) They often gather in various combinations at someone’s apartment. Cassian isn’t sure if they’re trying to keep him focused or making sure he’s taking care of himself (i.e., eating and bathing). Maybe it’s some combination of the two, what with Jyn’s foisting of Chinese takeout on him followed by her inquiries if he would like any assistance double-checking his data entry into the statistical software.

One evening a few days before Halloween, it’s just Jyn and Cassian in his apartment. They’ve been sitting in silence for the past hour on opposite ends of his sofa, Cassian parsing through his latest results and Jyn grading papers. The remains of their dinner—pizza, beer, and some raw kale (“we need a vegetable, Cassian”)—litter his coffee table. Jyn also has half of a Coke Zero left (last week she had waltzed into his apartment with a case and placed it into his fridge without comment). She’s got her back propped against the arm of his sofa and her legs up on the cushions so that her feet are brushing against his thigh. They’ve been doing this a lot lately, the touching. He thinks perhaps it should feel strange, but ever since she held his face in her hands and offered him her loyalty and support, he’s felt totally at ease with her.

“Cassian, scowling at your data isn’t going to make it any better.”

He blinks and turns his attention to Jyn, whose eyes are still on the paper she’s grading despite her comment.

“I am not scowling.”

“You are. I would know, I’m the one who has to look at your face.” 

“The data is fine. It’s me who’s the problem. I found an error in my data entry.”

“You need a break.”

“I need to finish this.”

“You’re mentally exhausted. If you keep working at this rate you’re going to continue making errors. Let’s take a break.”

She tosses aside her stack of papers and nudges him with her foot until he tears his gaze away from his laptop.

“We could watch one of those terrible Halloween movies,” she suggests.

“Maybe later. If we’re taking a break, I think I need to leave this apartment.”

“I have an idea then,” she says with a grin.

Jyn won’t tell him where they’re going as they climb into his car, instead typing some mystery address into her phone’s GPS and telling him where to turn. Cassian is surprised when they begin to leave the city behind and enter the considerably more agricultural area of the county. Soon they find themselves on a two-lane highway surrounded by cornfields, the moon shining fat and full just above the tree-line. 

“That must be it up ahead,” Jyn gestures as they approach a large field illuminated by a few portable stadium lights.

There are several dozen cars parked in the field and people guiding him to an empty spot when they pull in. A weathered sign welcomes them to Lah’mu Farms: Home of the State’s Largest Corn Maze. Cassian turns off the car with a chuckle.

“A corn maze, Jyn?”

“You bet your sweet, Pikachu-clad ass a corn maze. How can you pass up the biggest one in the state?”

“It would be a shame for me to graduate and not be able to say I’ve done this quintessential autumn activity.”

“There you have it.”

She climbs out of the car and practically bounces across the field she’s so pleased with herself. Cassian wonders if she’s genuinely full of this child-like glee, or if she’s just trying extra hard to be cheerful for him. He may need to remind his friends that he doesn’t need constant cheering, but one look at Jyn examining a particularly large pumpkin with a huge smile on her face is enough to make him hold his tongue. They stroll through rows of fall vegetables until they reach the small crowd of people at what he assumes to be the entrance to the maze. The young woman accepting the entry fee informs them that it’s half-price for couples tonight, and Jyn takes his arm and calls him “babe” until they’re out of earshot. He retaliates by squeezing her hip and calling her “mi amor.” Even after they’re swallowed by the maze, he is keenly aware of her shoulder brushing against his.

“I’ve heard the best strategy for these is to work your way to the outside,” he offers.

“Cassian Andor, corn maze expert. Lead on.”

Cassian takes point, and they very quickly find themselves lost in the corn. They agree not to use the flashlight setting on their phones, instead waiting for their eyes to adjust to the darkness. It’s surprising how isolated they feel, even though logically Cassian knows there are dozens of other people in the immediate area. The stalks towering over them have a muffling effect, and it isn’t long before the excited shrieks of children fall away. Jyn seems content to wander, her hands gently running along the stalks and her face slightly tilted up to be bathed in moonlight. He’s certain if he looked, he’d see stars reflected in her eyes.

Three months ago Cassian would have decked anyone who suggested he would fall for Jyn Erso. He hadn’t expected this. And he certainly hadn’t expected to realize it in the middle of a cornfield. But here they are, Jyn looking more relaxed than he’s ever seen her and Cassian transfixed by the moonlight in her hair.

“What?” she asks, and he realizes that he’s come to a halt, and he’s staring at her.

He can’t tell her. Not right now. Not when he’s focusing on work. So to diffuse the situation he plucks a piece of stray greenery that has somehow become lodged in her hair and holds it between them. He wants to say something glib, expects Jyn to beat him to it, but instead they just stare at each other. They’re standing way too close, and he’s suddenly extremely aware of her very full lips. He seems to be leaning forward without any conscious thought…

A young boy dressed as a pirate bursts out of the corn, and Jyn startles straight into Cassian’s arms. He reflexively steadies her. He can feel her heart racing. The boy pays them no mind, instead racing past them and turning a corner while cackling madly. Jyn laughs shakily and gently pushes herself away from his chest. Cassian releases her somewhat reluctantly.

A different kind of silence falls between them as they follow the boy down the path.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m not even sorry. Corn mazes are awesome.
> 
> Also, that awkward moment when you realize you’ve been spelling “Krennic” wrong. I’ve gone back to fix them.
> 
> Despite the chapter title, the song running through my mind while writing this was definitely “Ticks” by Brad Paisley. Because even though I’m not really a fan of country music, that song is actually kind of awesome.


	11. Thanksgiving

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanksgiving in America is celebrated on the fourth Thursday of November.

### Chapter 11: Thanksgiving

“What are you two doing for Thanksgiving?” asks Leia.

It’s the Monday before the holiday, and Cassian hadn’t really thought about what he’d be doing. Last year he, Melshi, and Kay ate some turkey sandwiches and watched American football. He had just sort of assumed he’d be doing the same thing again this year.

“I was planning on catching up on some work here,” replies Jyn. She had stopped by Cassian’s desk to return his stapler—taken without asking, as was her M.O.—and thus Leia had managed to catch them at the same time.

“Cassian?”

“I’m in-between experiments right now, so I won’t be in the office. Probably spend the day with Kay.”

“How would you feel about coming to dinner at my parents’?”

“Isn’t that kind of short notice?”

“They always have a ton of guests for Thanksgiving; they won’t mind a few more. Kay and Wedge said they’d come. Tynnra and Melshi already had plans.”

“This wouldn’t happen to have anything to do with you introducing Han to your parents for the first time, would it?” asks Jyn.

“Of course not. I just don’t want anyone to spend the holiday alone. Besides, my father is invested in this Department, and he’d like to meet some of you.”

Leia and Luke’s father is a U.S. senator. It isn’t necessarily surprising that he’d be personally invested in the work this Department does beyond the fact that his children are involved—Mon Mothma has given tours to members of Congress before, after all—but Cassian isn’t sure he’s ready to rub elbows with some of America’s leadership.

“In that case, we’ll be there,” Jyn answers.

“Excellent! Dinner is at 3:00.”

Leia wanders off, and Jyn hands Cassian his stapler with a grin, “Who am I to deny Leia her Han-buffer?”

“I suppose inviting a bunch of foreigners who all work with biothreat agents to dinner on the second-most-American holiday along with a cluster of politicians would have the desired effect of deflecting attention away from Han.”

“Foreigners? Speak for yourself, I’m American.”

“What? Really?”

“Dual-citizen. American father, British mother. I was born in England, though. We moved to the U.S. when I was four.”

It’s the first time Jyn has mentioned her parents, and there’s a hint of bitterness in her voice. Not for the first time, Cassian wonders how she ended up in foster care, but he’s the last person to pry open that door, given his own painful family history and lack of willingness to talk about it.

“Anyways,” she continues, “Alderaan is a two-hour drive. Want to carpool? I’ll even agree to share a car with Kay if he promises not to speak to me.”

* * *

They agree to meet at noon on Thursday at Cassian’s apartment, as he is the most centrally located. It’s been a while since Cassian has worn a suit and tie (perhaps last year’s EADU conference?), but he figures now is probably an appropriate time to dig them out of his closet. Kay and Wedge seem to have had the same idea. Jyn arrives shortly after they do, looking rather seasonal in a burnt orange sweater dress that hugs her form in all the right places and some brown boots. They secure their host gifts in the trunk of Wedge’s car (Leia hadn’t told them what to bring, so they all went with some form of alcohol) and pile in. Jyn and Cassian take the back seat, while Kay sits up front to navigate. It’s an interesting drive, with Kay insisting that certain routes are more efficient and Wedge ignoring him to go his own preferred ways to avoid traffic. Once they get closer to the unfamiliar territory of Alderaan, however, Wedge begrudgingly starts to listen to Kay’s prompts. They arrive on schedule, and are greeted by a clearly relieved Leia.

Cassian spends the hour before dinner snacking on the impressive array of hors d'oeuvres and answering questions from the various other politicians in attendance. There aren’t too many of them, mostly local government officials without children. Senator Organa seems to be the only one of them with a science background, but their interest is heartening nonetheless. He catches Jyn’s eye on more than one occasion and finds her doing much the same. She smiles at him every time.

After dinner, Breha Organa invites everyone into the parlor for cocktails, dessert, and—to Cassian’s surprise—board games. Leia smirks as she begins setting up the board for _Settlers of Catan_.

“Let’s see what you got, Erso.”

Luke and Mara volunteer to complete their quartet, so Cassian settles down to a game of _Battleship_ with Kay. The politicians decide on _Monopoly_ , and Cassian has to fight back a snort. It isn’t long before Cassian’s attention is drawn away from his own game to focus on the significantly rowdier _Catan_ game. Luke and Mara appear to be content to stare lovingly at each other while Leia and Jyn battle for control of the board. Jyn makes excellent use of the Robber, but Leia had the stronger opening position and is more strategic in her use of resources. Somehow she also manages to amass a larger army than Jyn. Despite Jyn’s valiant efforts, Leia claims victory.

“Ha! Look at my little empress!” Han crows when it’s over, and draws Leia into a victory kiss. Leia laughs when he releases her, a sound Cassian rarely hears from her. Maybe Han isn’t so bad after all. He glances at Jyn to find her smiling slightly at the couple. Perhaps she has come to the same realization.

* * *

They arrive back at Cassian’s apartment around 10:00, Jyn having spent almost the entire ride staring thoughtfully out the window. Kay and Wedge take their leave, but Jyn follows him into his home to retrieve a sweater she left there earlier in the week. He expects her to leave immediately after, but she lingers in the doorway.

“Could I sit for a bit?” she asks.

Cassian motions her toward the sofa and joins her shortly after with a Coke Zero for her and a glass of water for himself. She removes her boots, tucks her legs under herself, and lets her hair fall free of the clip that had been holding it up. Cassian hadn’t realized how long it had gotten, almost past her shoulder blades now. _God_ , but she looks good.

“Something on your mind?”

“Leia asked me today if we were sleeping together.”

Cassian chokes down his mouthful of water and fights to master himself. Jyn watches, face uncharacteristically blank.

“I just…I thought you should know.”

Jyn rises gracefully from his couch. She retrieves her boots, slips on a pair of flats she’d had in her purse, and is half-way out his door before he recovers. He isn’t sure what he plans on doing, but instinct tells him if he lets her go now without comment, things will never be the same between them. He catches her a few paces down the hall, and though his mind has no plan, his body doesn’t need one. 

He draws her into his arms and kisses her. 

It isn’t a gentle kiss, but she responds in kind, and suddenly they’re back in his apartment. Jyn has his shirt completely unbuttoned before they even make it to the bedroom, and nothing could have prepared him for the pleasure of her mouth and hands exploring his chest and abdomen. The dress he had so admired soon joins his shirt on the floor, and he delights in her small sighs as he trails kisses down from her collarbone to her stomach. Her breath hitches when he reaches her inner thigh, and she fists her hand into his hair to drag him back up to her lips. She kisses him deeply until she draws out a groan and deftly flips him onto his back. Cassian finds he does not mind relinquishing the dominant position.

Jyn laughs when she unbuckles his pants to find the Pikachu boxers, but before he can kiss that smug smirk off of her lips, she finds other uses for her mouth. It is tempting to lose himself in her ministrations, but Cassian doesn’t want to go over the edge. Not yet, and not without her. His voice cracks when he utters her name, but it’s enough for her to stop what she’s doing and look at him with a question in her eyes. He struggles into a sitting position and draws her into his lap. He runs one hand through her hair, coming to rest at the nape of her neck, and rests the other on her hip. She holds his gaze for an interminable moment, then guides his hands to remove the last bits of her clothing.

* * *

When Cassian awakens the next morning, Jyn is gone.


	12. After

### Chapter 12: After

Cassian’s initial feeling as he stares at the empty half of his bed is one of profound loss mixed with confusion. Why hadn’t she stayed? When had she even left? Cassian had fallen asleep sometime early this morning with Jyn in his arms, her legs tangled with his and her nose nuzzling affectionately into his neck. There had been no hint of embarrassment or regret last night. Did what they had shared with each other in the dark look so different in the light of morning?

He drags himself out of bed and retrieves the Pikachu boxers from where Jyn discarded them on the floor. He pads into the kitchen and fills a glass of water from the tap. It’s then that he sees the post-it note in the middle of his counter: **Needed to check on Stardust.**

Well, at least she had left a note to help dispel the awkwardness, even if it’s one of the weakest plausible excuses she could have given. (How many times had he seen her text Bodhi to check on the rabbit for her when they were in the middle of working late?) Cassian checks his phone to see if he has any messages from her, but there’s nothing new. He wonders if he should call her but decides on a text message instead. If she’s feeling flighty, he doesn’t want to pressure her into a spoken conversation. Give her a chance to think about her answer.

[9:27 AM] Would you like to get coffee this afternoon?

[Jyn E. – 9:48 AM] I would like that.

[9:50 AM] 3:15 at Jabba’s Java Palace ok?

[Jyn E. – 9:55 AM] Sounds good. See you then. :)

Nothing amiss about the exchange. His text thread with Jyn is a mixture of practical work questions, snarky commentary on various subjects, science puns, and sporadic pictures of Stardust “being adorable” (Jyn’s words, though Cassian usually has to agree). Cassian really can’t read much into her replies beyond that the first one took a bit longer than usual for her, provided she wasn’t in the middle of something. But she had replied (with a smiley), and she had agreed to see him, so that’s a good sign, right?

* * *

Cassian arrives at Jabba’s a little after 3:00 and claims a table toward the back where it’s quiet and they’ll be able to talk more privately. He sits facing the door so he can watch for Jyn, and orders a house coffee for himself and a hot chocolate with extra whipped cream for Jyn.

[3:12 PM] I ordered your usual.

[3:29 PM] Are you stuck in traffic? I can get these to-go and meet you at Endor Park if you like.

3:48 PM: “You have reached the voice mailbox of _Jyn Erso_. Please record your message after the tone. When you are finished recording, press—“

[3:53 PM] Jyn, are you ok? Please call me when you get this…

* * *

Cassian checks his phone for what must be the dozenth time since he sent Jyn the last message. He’s been home for a few hours, and still no word from Jyn. Bodhi’s words from last September keep running through his mind ( _“Owen and Beru had a home invasion yesterday. Thugs roughed them up a bit. Kicked their door right in.”_ ), and he can’t shake the feeling that something bad has happened to Jyn. She isn’t the type of woman who would stand him up and then ignore subsequent attempts to contact her; if Jyn Erso isn’t interested in a date, you will definitely know it.

_Screw it,_ he thinks and walks to his car with purpose.

Maybe it’s a bit early to be acting like the overprotective boyfriend, but right now his actions are driven by worry for a friend. He just needs to make sure she’s ok.

When he arrives at Jyn’s apartment, there are no telltale signs of trouble. Her car is parked in its usual spot, but her windows appear dark. He takes the stairs two at a time and almost bowls over Bodhi on one of the blind landings.

“I’m so sorry!” Bodhi exclaims.

“It was my fault,” Cassian says. “I shouldn’t have been rushing around the turns. Have you seen Jyn today?”

“Yeah, a little after she got in this morning. That must’ve been one hell of a Thanksgiving dinner you guys went to. She said she had a date later, though, so if you’re looking for her, you’re probably out of luck.”

“It was with me. The date.”

“Oh. Oh! When did you two…?”

“She didn’t show. And she’s not answering her phone.”

Bodhi’s brow furrows, “That’s not like her.”

“I know. I got a little worried.”

“It’s been quiet here.”

“I’d still like to check.”

“Of course,” Bodhi nods.

The two men take the final flight of stairs, and Cassian knocks on Jyn’s door. There is no answer.

“Jyn?” Cassian calls as he knocks a bit more urgently, and then quietly to Bodhi, “Her car is here. Would she have walked somewhere?”

“I don’t know, but I have her spare key.”

“Jyn, please answer if you’re there. I just need to know that you’re ok. If you don’t want to see me, Bodhi is here too.”

Bodhi has the grace not to comment on why Jyn wouldn’t want to see Cassian. He’s just reaching past Cassian to unlock Jyn’s door when they hear the distinctive sound of a chain and deadbolt being undone. She’s obviously been crying recently, and she looks more exhausted than Cassian has ever seen her. She’s fully dressed, but her hair is mussed on one side, and Cassian suspects they’ve woken her. His initial panic morphs into a different kind of concern.

“Cassian?” she asks.

“I was worried.”

“Jabba’s! I’m so sorry, Cassian. Something came up.”

Obviously.

“Are you alright?”

He winces internally, as she is most certainly _not_ alright, but he isn’t sure what else to ask. He had been prepared to deal with some kind of emotional fallout, but whatever is going on here is very clearly not about him, or them, or last night.

“I’ve had better days,” she says, and attempts a smile, but it doesn’t reach her eyes.

“Would you like to talk about it?”

“No. But we should talk about last night.”

Bodhi, who had been hovering behind Cassian until now, pipes up, “I guess this is my cue to leave. Let me know if you need anything, Jyn?”

She nods an affirmative to Bodhi and steps aside to let Cassian into the apartment. They sit on opposite ends of her sofa, and he waits for her to say something.

“I should apologize for leaving before you woke up.”

“I wondered if you thought we’d made a mistake.”

It feels wrong to be talking about this now, when something else had happened to eclipse it. Something that had reduced Jyn to this world-weary, swollen-eyed state he sees before him now.

“Maybe we did,” she says quietly, and she’s staring at her hands in her lap. After a heartbeat, she looks up to meet his gaze, and continues. “Cassian, last night was…very good. I enjoyed myself immensely. I enjoyed _you_ immensely. But we work together. We’re supposed to be colleagues. You’re supposed to be focusing on your dissertation. I don’t think we can do that if we’re fucking. I think we should just be friends. We’re good at that. At being friends.”

Cassian wants to say that they’re good at being lovers, too. Jyn may have used the word “fucking” (intentionally, he thinks, to reduce the gravity of what they’d done), but what they did last night was much, much more than the fruition of simple lust. He had _wanted_ her. All of her: body, mind, and soul. Jyn isn’t shy about offering the first, and all her friends benefit from the second. But she’s very careful with the third, and unless Cassian is very much mistaken, he’s fairly certain she offered him a small portion of it. That was not fucking. That was making love.

But there’s a pleading look in Jyn’s eyes that’s beseeching him to accept her explanation, so he doesn’t say any of this. If he pushes now, he will lose her friendship, and while the knowledge that she doesn’t want any repeats of the previous night sits like a boulder on his chest, he cannot bear the thought of losing her entirely. There’s only one thing he can say.

“Ok. Friends.”

“Friends.”

When Cassian leaves, he is hyper-aware of her gaze on his back.

“Cassian?”

He turns with half a hope that she’s changed her mind.

“Thank you for coming to check on me. You’re a good friend. I’ll see you on Monday.”

He’s seen the flush of her bare skin under his hands. Tasted the sweat from the curve of her breasts. Felt the warm weight of her above him, beneath him, around him. Heard his name fall from her lips as he brought her to ecstasy.

How can he be just friends, after that?


	13. Just Friends & Free Food

### Chapter 13: Just Friends & Free Food

Cassian wonders if he should be offended at how well Jyn does “just friends.” He hadn’t heard from her at all for the remainder of the weekend and had refrained from texting Bodhi to ask how she was doing. He was therefore quite unsure what to expect when he arrived at work on Monday, but Jyn had given no indication that anything had changed in their relationship (or rather, lack of relationship) status. Upon his arrival in the office, she had simply slid his favorite mug full of black coffee onto his desk just as she’d taken to doing every morning since The Scoop and asked if he’d finished writing his lit review yet. He had sipped his coffee before replying, using the moment as an excuse to carefully gather all his feelings for this woman, pack them into a little box, and tuck that box into a corner of his mind. If she can pretend as though last Thursday and Friday never happened, then so can he. 

Except there are now some notable differences in how they act around one another. To the casual observer, they would look like any other colleagues who occasionally hang out socially, but Leia, at least, notices the change. (Cassian catches her eyeing them suspiciously during Wednesday’s journal club when Jyn sits down on the opposite side of Kay instead of next to Cassian.) It’s not like they’re attempting to avoid each other, per se, but Cassian no longer finds himself alone with Jyn. She doesn’t invite herself over to his apartment, and he doesn’t linger behind after game night when she hosts it that Thursday. The only times she visits his desk are to ask legitimate work questions. Her text messages still contain plenty of selfies with Stardust and lamentations on dealing with Leia and Han’s bickering, but he no longer receives random ones at odd times of night or first thing in the morning like he used to. It’s quite similar in nature to the friendship he has with Kay or Melshi.

It isn’t enough. But for now it has to be.

* * *

A week into December, Jyn bursts into the office clutching a flyer in her right hand.

“The Physics Department has a bigwig visiting lecturer!” she announces.

“How big of a bigwig?” asks Wedge.

“Word on the street is buffet-style catering after the lecture.”

Wedge whistles in appreciation, “That’s a pretty big bigwig.”

“So are we crashing this thing or what?”

“What’s the lecture on?” asks Luke.

Jyn reads her flyer before replying, “Um…harnessing the Casimir force.”

“What’s a Casimir force?” pipes up Tynnra.

“I have no idea.”

“You’re going to attend a lecture on a subject which you know absolutely nothing about just because there will be a buffet afterwards?” Kay inquires.

“Yes, Kay, I am a graduate student. I would attend a _sociology_ lecture if it meant I got a free sandwich out of it. But to be clear, I said ‘crash.’ It’s really easy to sneak in for the food for Physics Department lectures.”

Clearly Jyn has done this before.

“What happens if someone asks what you thought of the lecture?”

Jyn shoots Kay an exasperated look, “Obviously I’ll read the abstract of her paper before I go. And look up what a Casimir force is.”

“Why does this not surprise me,” Kay mutters.

“Well, I’m in,” says Luke. “But I’m going to the lecture. It doesn’t feel right to just show up for the food.”

“Then you better get moving, Skywalker”—Jyn uses the nickname Leia sarcastically christened him with after his ill-fated and short-lived foray into the world of parkour—“because it starts in 7 minutes.”

“What? Ugh, I’ll never make that in time!” Luke bemoans as he grabs his coat and rockets out the door.

“I’ll text you what a Casimir force is, since you’re going to miss the intro!” Jyn calls after him. “Any other takers? Wedge? Tynnra? Cassian?”

“No way am I risking the wrath of the Physics Department,” Tynnra replies.

“I have a meeting with Dodonna,” says Wedge. “I may be able to sneak in later.”

“I’m with you, Jyn. And so is Kay.”

Cassian should protest that this infiltration of the Physics Department is a bad idea, but he forgot to grab his lunch this morning, and the thought of all that delicious free food is tempting. Besides, he knows for a fact that the Physics Department graduate students show up for this Department’s post-lecture food all the time, courtesy of Wedge admitting as much. It’s time they returned the favor. Kay is glaring daggers at him, but Cassian can tell he’s actually interested to see how this goes, not that he would ever admit it.

Thus, he and Kay find themselves flanking Jyn as they attempt to stealthily blend in to the crowd pouring out of the Physics Department’s main lecture hall an hour and a half later. Jyn peppers a few buzzwords into her sentences for the benefit of the people around them (“vacuum,” “zero-point energy,” “silicon chips”), and they join the buffet line. Their plates loaded with food, Kay peels off when he spots Luke, leaving Jyn and Cassian to themselves in the sea of physics enthusiasts.

“Jyn, you made it! And Cassian, too!”

It’s Bodhi, and now Cassian remembers that Jyn has an inside source to tip her off on the food. 

“Oh yes. We were just discussing the merits of repulsive quantum forces,” supplies Jyn.

“Dr. Nu’s nanophotonic technique approach was quite elegant,” adds Cassian.

Bodhi narrows his eyes, “You’re just here for the food, aren’t you? No way you came to the lecture. I expect this behavior from you, Jyn, but et tu, Cassian?”

“Sorry, Bodhi, you know I’ll follow wherever Jyn leads.”

It was meant to be a self-deprecating joke, but it falls a little flat, probably because it’s actually true. The logical part of Cassian’s brain—the part that secures his little locked cage full of Feelings for Jyn—screams that it is ridiculous for him to feel this way about a rebellious woman he’s known for all of 6 months (a third of which he spent despising her), a woman who won’t let herself love him back. But unfortunately for him, that locked cage isn’t sound-proof, and its contents keep whispering “hope.”

Before anyone can comment further, Wedge appears at Bodhi’s shoulder with a full plate, “Dr. Tagge incoming!”

Cassian doesn’t know who Dr. Tagge is, but from the way Jyn and Bodhi both stiffen, it doesn’t look like he wants to find out. He’s guessing Dr. Tagge is the middle-aged man with the pronounced frown making his way toward them through the crowd.

“He knows I wasn’t at the lecture. Unless you want him complaining to Draven and Mothma, I suggest you two make yourselves scarce. Distract him, would you, Bodhi?”

“What? By myself?” stammers Bodhi.

“Talk about hoverboards!” suggests Jyn.

“Jyn, I cannot talk to my department head about hoverboards!” Bodhi hisses.

“Why not? Why would anyone care about quantum levitation unless it helps to make a hoverboard?”

“Bodhi,” Cassian cuts in, “you can do this. We have complete faith in you. Make one man feel like a hundred.”

With that, he grabs Jyn’s arm and guides her out of the reception area after Wedge, leaving behind a rather befuddled Bodhi. Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Bodhi engage Dr. Tagge, and he distinctly hears the younger man use the word “hoverboard.”

“’Make one man feel like a hundred?’”

Cassian shrugs, “My football—er, _soccer_ coach used to say that during half-time when we were losing. And he said it a lot because we lost a lot. His version of a pep talk, I guess. Seemed like something Bodhi needed to hear.”

Jyn laughs heartily and makes some comment about how she owes Bodhi a beer or two, but Cassian isn’t really paying attention to her words. He hasn’t heard her laugh like that—unguarded and gleeful—since Thanksgiving, and he hadn’t even realized it until now. His heart gives a dangerous twinge, and the whispers of “hope” intensify.

By some unspoken understanding, they end up at the koi pond. Between the cold weather and impending final exams, the whole area is deserted. There is a very thin layer of ice on the pond’s surface, but they can still see the fish lazily drifting about. The grasses and most of the water plants have died for the winter, their husks rustling dryly in the frigid wind being funneled through the gap in the buildings. Jyn hisses a bit in protest at the cold stone as she sits down on the wall. Cassian settles down beside her, and they sit in companionable silence as they finish their ill-gotten food. He’s missed being with her like this.

Cassian gathers their empty paper plates and throws them in a nearby trash bin. Jyn watches him inscrutably from her perch on the wall as he returns. When he’s still several paces away, she seems to come to a decision.

“Fuck it,” she announces, rising to her feet.

And then her hand is gathering a fistful of his coat, she’s pulling him down to her level, and her lips are on his. Cassian hesitates for only a moment before eagerly kissing her back. His hands find their way to her face, and she tightens her hold on him. It’s a desperate thing, both of them rushing to make up for the days lost where they could have been doing this. When they break apart for air, Jyn’s lips are swollen, her pupils are hugely dilated, and she’s practically panting. He slides his hands down to her waist and leans down until his nose is hovering in the hollow where her jaw meets her ear.

“What happened to just being friends?” he asks, his own breathing heavy and voice husky.

“Friends can fuck.”

He presses a gentle kiss to her neck, thankful that she left her scarf behind in the office.

“What about sex distracting us from our work?”

“ _Not_ having sex is distracting me far more from my work.”

He nibbles at her earlobe and is rewarded with a shiver that has nothing to do with the cold.

“That so?” he asks innocently.

“Shut up,” she laughs.

“Make me.”

She does with another kiss, this one less desperate but no less searing. Cassian’s tongue has just started exploring Jyn’s mouth when an insistent beeping comes from the back pocket of her jeans.

“Should you check that?” Cassian murmurs against her mouth.

“It’s just my timepoint reminder,” she answers unconcernedly around kisses, and then, “Shit, it’s my timepoint reminder!”

Jyn extricates herself from his embrace, and just like that she’s running full-tilt back toward their building. So much for him not distracting her from her work.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Because no story about graduate school is complete without a raid for free food.
> 
> Sorry for the delayed update. In addition to it being a crazy couple of weeks for me personally, I kept changing my mind on how I wanted this chapter to go down. Still not sure I made the right choice, but hopefully it was an enjoyable read regardless.
> 
> Full confession: I had never heard of the Casimir force prior to writing this chapter, and I did very, very little reading about it.


	14. All you have to do is stay

### Chapter 14: All you have to do is stay

With a final gentle kiss, Cassian rolls off of Jyn and onto his back at her side. She lets out a small, contented sigh and presses her lips to his shoulder before sitting up and swinging her legs over the edge of the bed. He reaches out to trace his knuckles down her spine, and she pauses in her exit from the bed.

“You don’t have to leave.”

“That’s not how this works, Cassian.”

He’s sitting up now, too. He snakes his arms around her waist, pulls her flush against his chest, and kisses the nape of her neck.

“It could. Stay. I’ll make it worth your while.”

His hands are wandering to other places, and for a moment it seems like maybe he has Jyn convinced. But then she’s pulling away and fully off the bed. It’s all Cassian can do to not sigh forlornly. Hopefully the dim lighting obscures the look of disappointment he is sure adorns his face right now. He leans back against the headboard and watches Jyn pull on the clothing that has been discarded around his bedroom.

They’ve been doing this almost every night (and sometimes during the day) for the better part of two weeks now, and Cassian isn’t sure it’s actually an improvement from their post-Thanksgiving interaction. Yes, the sex is excellent—Jyn is perhaps the best partner he’s had—but Cassian was rather hoping to be more than friends who fuck. And he has no illusions that that is exactly what they are right now. To be fair to Jyn, she had made it very clear that night after their very public makeout session at the koi pond that she just needed sex without feelings. She’d shown up on his doorstep, gotten his pants off rather quickly, and proceeded to do some rather amazing things with her mouth, but she’d balked when he tried to return the favor. Instead, she’d ridden him until they were both senseless, thanked him, and then left. Her pattern hasn’t changed much since then, despite Cassian’s efforts to take things slower. The problem is that she gives him one dark look, and his body betrays him. It’s quite impossible for him to think clearly when her hands and mouth are on him like that, and she’s just so _eager_. Even when he initiates their encounters, Jyn still manages to seize control of the situation, and he ends up just the same as always: sexually satisfied but emotionally confused.

Jyn is fully clothed now. She kisses Cassian in a way that feels like an apology and lingers in his space for a few heartbeats before once again straightening. 

“I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“My offer still stands.”

She smiles weakly and leaves.

* * *

Cassian knocks on Jyn’s door at promptly 6:15 as agreed upon at work that afternoon. He can hear the faint sounds of Christmas music coming from the other side. She opens her door almost immediately, and he doesn’t bother to stifle his snort.

“Too much?” she asks with a grin that suggests she doesn’t care one bit if it is.

“Mothma said the prize was for tackiest holiday _sweater_ , not ensemble.”

In addition to an undeniably tacky sweater (a poorly-knit, baggy thing in an unfortunate shade of bright-yet-still-sickly green emblazoned with a large teddy bear wearing a Santa hat and looking positively nightmarish), Jyn is wearing a light-up bulb necklace set to flash in alternating colors and a pair of cloth reindeer antlers with bells that jingle when she moves her head. Cassian’s own sweater vest (black with red and green Christmas trees) is tame by comparison. He steps into her apartment and gently reaches for the little bells.

“The antlers are kind of cute, though, Vixen,” he says with a lopsided smile.

“Hm. Should I leave them on later when I let you get me out of this sweater?”

Cassian thinks perhaps they should just skip the departmental party and have their own private affair. The thought of Jyn in nothing but those antlers is a fantasy he didn’t even know he had. But when he moves to hungrily capture her mouth with his, she stops him with a finger to his lips. 

“You do not get to mess up my makeup, Cassian Andor,” she states firmly as though reading his mind, but after a dissatisfied groan from Cassian she adds, “Not yet, at least. Party first.”

She retrieves a Santa hat from her coffee table and pulls it onto his head before turning her attention to finding her wayward rabbit. Cassian watches with the ghost of a smile as she secures Stardust in his cage. The rabbit huffs impatiently, and she gives him a carrot from the mini stocking she’s hung on the wall for him above the cage. She strokes him fondly on the nose, tells him to be a good boy while they’re gone, and turns to Cassian. Jyn may be dressed like Christmas threw up on her and speaking to her rabbit like some women speak to human babies, but all he sees is the woman he loves dorkily excited for a departmental party and unashamedly showing him her true self. Cassian pauses. Loves. He loves her?

“You ok?” she asks.

“Fine,” he replies in a voice he hopes doesn’t sound too strangled. “We should go. Don’t forget your gift.”

Jyn retrieves her contribution to the white elephant gift exchange, and Cassian helps her into her coat. They wander together into the night and toward Jyn’s car. Cassian rolls down his window during the short drive from her place to the bar. The cold air helps clear his head. He’ll analyze his feelings later.

The party is surprisingly fun. Usually these things are a little awkward, but the addition of the tacky sweater element seems to serve as a great equalizer between the faculty and students, as they all look ridiculous. Even Draven is participating, which quite frankly shocks Cassian. Kay ends up taking the grand prize (his sweater is homemade—a red sweatshirt with tiny ornaments taped to it). When it comes time for the gift exchange, Jyn ends up stealing a pair of Squirtle boxers from Melshi, giving Cassian a very knowing smirk.

Cassian is waiting at the bar for the group’s latest round when a young woman sidles up next to him. She orders a shot of whiskey and looks him up and down.

“I like your sweater,” she says. “Your girlfriend pick it out?”

“No girlfriend to blame this embarrassment on, I’m afraid. It just turns out I have terrible taste in holiday sweaters.”

“Tall, dark, handsome, sexy accent, _and_ funny. How are you single?” she edges closer to him and gently rests her hand on his forearm. “Maybe we could chat?”

Cassian freezes. He hadn’t meant to flirt. He makes little comments like that to Jyn all the time, and she simply laughs and agrees with him. Or laughs and pulls him into a kiss that ends up with them naked in bed. Or all three. It’s been a while since a woman has responded to his humor with this coy sort of complimenting. She seems pleasant enough, but all he can think about is how he and Jyn had found their sweaters together in a thrift shop across town last weekend and then discussed a data analysis dilemma Cassian was currently having afterwards while sipping warm beverages (coffee for him, hot chocolate for her) back in Cassian’s apartment.

“I’m sorry, but I’m here with my work group. I need to get back to them.”

“Too bad. I probably would have let you take me home.”

No sooner has Cassian arrived back in the corner the group has commandeered than Leia is pulling out the chair opposite him. She looks serious.

“So are you and Jyn together or what?”

Cassian glances around to see if anyone else has heard, but they’re all occupied with the fresh drinks. 

“What makes you ask that?”

The look Leia gives him says _Cassian, please_.

“We’re not dating, no,” he deflects.

“Could’ve fooled me.”

“What do you mean?”

“You arrived together—“

“So did you and Luke, so I really hope arriving together doesn’t signify being a couple.”

“—and you’ve been staring at her practically the entire night. Also, you use sarcasm as a defense mechanism, so your interruption is telling.”

“We’re not together.”

“Then why did Jyn look like she was ready to spit venom when that woman tried to get you to take her home?”

Cassian’s heart gives a dangerous leap. _Hope_ , it whispers. _No_ , he tells it, _she was probably just thinking that if I went home with another woman she wouldn’t be having sex tonight herself_.

“Jyn almost always looks like she’s ready to spit venom. It’s her default facial expression,” he replies, and he’s not wrong; Jyn has a serious case of RBF.

“Not when she’s looking at you.”

Now it’s Cassian’s turn to give her the _Leia, please_ look.

Leia rolls her eyes in exasperation, “Jesus, Cassian. Here I was thinking you’d be the sensible one who could be convinced to acknowledge the chemistry between you two, but you’re just as bad as she is.”

“Chemistry is not the problem. Jyn doesn’t do feelings.”

“Jyn doesn’t…oh for fuck’s sake! How can you have seen her rant about my father’s dipshit colleagues on Capitol Hill or eviscerate Melshi without realizing that Jyn is a creature driven by her feelings? She wields them like truncheons. She has opinions, strong opinions, on just about everything, and she will gladly volunteer those opinions. But when it comes to you she’s tight-lipped and evasive. I don’t know what’s going on between you two, but do yourselves a favor, and figure it out.”

With that, she leaves to return to her seat with Jyn and Tynnra. The party starts to break up after two more rounds, but Cassian had stopped drinking after his talk with Leia. He needs to be able to think clearly. He and Jyn stroll in the direction where they parked. With school out for winter break and it being so close to Christmas, the city streets are quiet. Surprisingly, snow flurries begin to fall.

“Why didn’t you flirt back with that woman at the bar?”

He’s about to reply with some flippant response about how she wasn’t his type when Leia’s admonition to _figure it out_ comes back to him.

“I didn’t want to.”

“I wouldn’t have minded,” Jyn says with a bravado he easily identifies as false. “Our relationship is sex with no strings attached. If you want to sleep with other people I understand.”

Cassian stops in his tracks and takes a deep breath before taking the plunge, “I don’t want to sleep with other people.”

“Cassian--“

“Please, Jyn, let me finish. I don’t want to sleep with other people because I care about you. I have for a while, and I think you feel the same. What happened between us on Thanksgiving…that was more than just sex, Jyn. These past two weeks have been extremely confusing for me. Because I want you. All of you, not just your body. We could be good together. I wish you would give us a chance.”

“I’m not used to people sticking around when things go bad,” she says in a small voice, not meeting his gaze.

He reaches for her and gently lifts her chin so he can look her in the eyes, “I’m not going anywhere.”

“I’ve got baggage, Cassian.”

“So do I,” he replies quietly, stroking her cheek with his thumb, “but if everyone waited until they had their shit together before starting a relationship we’d all be perpetually alone. You just need to find someone whose baggage goes with yours, and is willing to help you carry it.”

Jyn’s eyes are suspiciously bright as she stands on her tip toes to kiss him. It’s a chaste kiss, just the gentle press of lips as he cradles her face in his hands, and Cassian wouldn’t have this moment any other way.

“Ok,” she says once she pulls away.

* * *

Cassian does help Jyn out of her sweater that night, but they don’t have sex. Instead he savors the feel of her in his arms and the sound of her voice murmuring in the darkness as they lie talking in her bed late into the night.

When Cassian awakens the next morning, Jyn is curled at his side.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shameless abuse of lines from _Rent_.
> 
> The good news: the spending bill got passed, so I don’t have to go on an unplanned, unpaid vacation of indeterminate length. Yay for a paycheck. The bad news…I will continue to update slowly because I’m not going on an unplanned, unpaid vacation of indeterminate length. Sorry I’ve been so slow lately, y’all. Back when I first started this fic I was like “I’ll update every Friday and Monday!” And then it was like “I’ll update every Friday.” And now it’s like “Writing is hard.” Some of the members of this fandom make it look so easy! But hopefully the waits are worth it. On my honor as a scientist, I will not abandon this fic. I have an ending planned out and everything.
> 
> Side note: today I learned that while I’ve only ever heard “vixen” used to describe a sexy (or dare I say it, _foxy_ ) woman, apparently the official definition is that she’s a shrew. How do some words come to be used in the exact opposite of their official meanings? Language is weird.


	15. So baby pull me closer

### Chapter 15: So baby pull me closer

Cassian is a bit surprised he is awake before Jyn, but he isn’t about to complain. She’s warm and peaceful and practically burrowed into his side, mouth slightly agape, hair splayed partially across her face and partially across the pillow, one arm slung over his chest. He lies there for a few minutes in a half-asleep calm, listening to Jyn’s quiet breathing and taking comfort that she’s here.

Eventually he slides out of the cocoon of the blankets, being careful not to disturb Jyn and instantly feeling the loss of her warmth. She mumbles a bit in protest but settles back down quickly. He gently pushes the hair back from her face and smiles when she nestles into the blankets he tucks around her, then makes his way quietly out of the bedroom. Cassian wants to make her breakfast, but Jyn’s refrigerator is unfortunately even more sparse than usual. (She’s going to her brother’s for Christmas, so she hadn’t gone grocery shopping this week.) He settles for making her some hot chocolate. Jyn is awake and sitting up when he returns to the bedroom. Cassian sits on the bed beside her and greets her with a lingering kiss.

“Good morning,” he whispers huskily when they break apart.

Jyn takes a sip of the hot chocolate he offers her, and says “I was going to be offended that my boyfriend let me wake up alone in a cold bed after our first night as a couple, but I really can’t be mad if this is how you say good morning.”

“I wanted to make you breakfast.”

“I’m afraid you’re out of luck on that account.”

“I noticed. We can go out somewhere.”

“We could,” she muses and after setting her mug down on the nightstand, “or we could spend the rest of the morning in this bed. There are a few things I would really like to do to you.”

She’s leaning into his space now, lips very close to his. He can taste the chocolate on her tongue when she kisses him. Her hands sneak under the hem of his t-shirt, but he claims them with his own before she can get his shirt off.

“But what about breakfast?” he asks with mock sincerity.

“That’s what brunch is for.”

“Are we brunch people?”

“Brunch is a very couple-y thing to do, or so I’m told.”

Cassian pretends to think it over, “Fine, I will try brunch, but only on one condition.”

“Name your terms,” she laughs.

He brings her hand to his lips and brushes her knuckles across them, “You allow me to do some things to _you_.”

A look of uncertainty clouds Jyn’s features, so he clarifies, “You’ve never let me pleasure you. If there’s a reason you don’t want me to, I retract my condition, but I would really like to do it.”

“It’s just…” she trails off and worries at her lower lip in a way that is quite distracting and almost breaks Cassian’s resolve. “It seems very intimate.”

“I want intimate,” he says softly. “I want you. Tell me what you want.”

They’ve been slowly leaning into one another again, so it’s easy for Cassian to dip his lips to her neck. Jyn doesn’t answer, at least not with words, but her hands bury themselves in his hair as he lavishes kisses along her jawline and throat. He gently pushes her back into the pillows, grinning at her look of frustration that his mouth has left her. He takes his time undressing her and exploring her, mentally cataloging every hitch of her breath and how she responds to his caresses. He takes particular pleasure in drawing a sound from her that surprises them both when his mouth finds a sensitive spot in the crook of her knee. It isn’t long after that that Jyn is gasping his name and telling him what she wants.

* * *

Some time later as they’re lying in post-coital bliss, Cassian running a soothing hand up and down Jyn’s back while she does the same to his chest, Cassian decides to broach a topic he has been wondering about.

“Jyn,” he begins carefully.

“Hm?”

“Why did you really leave that first time?”

It isn’t exactly the question he wants to ask ( _What happened that afternoon? Why did you push me away?_ ), but it’s one that needs answering, especially since he suspects he already knows the answer.

Jyn’s hand stills and she turns her head so she can look at him. She is silent for long enough that he doesn’t think she’ll give him an answer, much less an honest one, but she surprises him. 

“I never stay. I never wanted to until you. And if you had woken up and found me there and didn’t want to, I couldn’t handle that rejection from you, Cassian.”

She had been afraid. His heart aches a bit for her.

“So you ran?”

“It’s what I do.”

“You’re not running now.”

“No, and honestly I’m not sure why that is. You make me think that perhaps intimacy isn’t such a bad thing. If more people were like you, maybe I wouldn’t want to push them all away.”

“I meant what I said last night, Jyn, that I’m not going anywhere. I have a tendency to shut people out, but I want nothing more than to let you in. Our friendship came so easily after we got over our mutual dislike of one another.”

“And now look at us,” she smiles.

“I am. And I doubt I will ever grow weary of the sight of you.”

Jyn repositions herself so she can kiss him, “I rather like the sight of you naked in my bed as well, Cassian Andor.”

“I enjoy being naked in your bed, Jyn Erso.”

Jyn burrows back into his chest and resumes the leisurely drag of her fingertips across his skin, “This is nice. And not just the being naked part. Last night was nice, too. The talking. Sharing pieces of ourselves. Can we just stay like this?”

Cassian is about to say he’d like nothing better than to continue lying here with her, when his stomach gives a rather audible rumble. Jyn begins to laugh, but then her stomach growls in reply.

“I guess that answers that. Take me to brunch?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this is a short update—it was originally supposed to go through Christmas Eve, but the break seemed more appropriate for a chapter ending than a section break. So you get to look forward to Christmas fluff for next time. Which will hopefully not take another 2+ weeks to deliver. :/ But I’m looking forward to writing some Grade A, 100% pure fluff, complete with Kes, Shara, and their 3 kids.


End file.
